Diablo III Review

Here it is. After 10 long years of waiting, Diablo III was unleashed upon the gaming world on May 15, 2012. Millions of players signed on to battle the legions of Hell and save the land known as Sanctuary. Records were shattered, and Blizzard Entertainment’s coffers, already swollen with World of Warcraft profits, overflowed even more. The action-RPG which defined (and essentially created) the action-RPG genre had returned.

The first two games in the series offered near unlimited play, helped out by a brilliant game mechanic which randomized the world with each playthrough. The objectives were the same, but the path to them could be very different. Loot was also random, with every kill offering a chance at weapons and armor of great power. Multiple difficulty levels ensured hours and hours of playtime as you battled beasts of ever-increasing ferocity in your quest to kill the titular demon lord, Diablo. And how did you battle these demon hordes? By clicking your mouse endlessly. That’s it. If you can click a mouse, you can play Diablo. Another brilliant design, the controls made Diablo incredibly easy to learn, though of course difficult to truly master.

In short, the first two games provided astounding depth of play that created a cycle of addiction that could only be broken by pressing ‘uninstall!’ Ok, in most cases that is an exaggeration, but both Diablo I and II are classics of PC gaming, and naturally expectations for Diablo III were sky-high. So, the question on the minds of every reader (other than “When will he get to the point?”) is: Does Diablo III live up to those lofty expectations?

My friends, I am here today to tell you……..meh. The gameplay is still the inspired click-fest that revolutionized the RPG genre, but it just feels…stale. There is nothing new, aside from the admittedly excellent graphics and spectacularly grisly sound effects, to recommend Diablo for long-term play.

I’ve completed the game on Normal and Nightmare difficulty, but as I was smashing through enemies in Hell difficulty, I realized I was no longer having fun. The game had become all about loot drops and trying to survive each pull. Patches were released that fixed problems and added new ones. Classes were redesigned and enemies buffed, nerfed, and sauteed to the point where they don’t know who to attack anymore. All this sounded familiar, and I realized why I was no longer having fun. I was playing World of Diablo-craft. Single player World of Diablo-craft.

But wait…didn’t I quit World of Warcraft because it had become nothing but endless grinding and loot-snatching? Yes I did. Was there anything in Diablo (truthfully) to set it apart from this model? Let’s see: Gear grind, check; Endless monsters, check; gimmicky boss fights, check; crafting, check; auction house, check…wait, auction house?

Yep. Blizzard added an auction house. On paper it seems like a good idea, giving players a chance to spend their hard-earned gold to improve their gear rather than endlessly farming monsters in the hope that something good will drop. And, at first, that did seem to be the case. Unfortunately, compared to the crazy-powerful gear you can purchase (often times at a pittance), the gear that actually drops off monsters is…is there a nice way to say horrible? The thrill of looting was replaced by, “Let me pop into the auction house for 30 sec, ooooooooooh, Awesome Axe of Monster Castration in exchange for 50 copper nickels!”

Not to mention…………………………………………………………..ohcrapwasthatlag? Oh good, laaaaaaaaag in my singleplayerRPG…

Oops…sorry, I DC’ed there. Wait, why did I DC in a single player game? Oh, that would be because Blizzard has proclaimed that none shall play Diablo III without connecting to the great and undying Blizzard serv———ERROR 37, PLEASE TRY AGAIN LATER.

Ok, I’ll stop. And I will admit that Blizzard has fixed many of the technical issues the game launched with. But after the brilliance of Diablo I and II, Diablo III is a spectacular disappointment. I absolutely loved it on my first playthrough, and was enjoying getting the achievements and hacking my way through the legions of Hell with my barbarian. Sadly, the game lost its luster very quickly.

Just so you don’t think I’m only being negative, here are some good things to read! This is still a Blizzard production, and that alone puts it a step above much of the competition. Solid voice talent, fantastic graphics, beautiful sound, and an engaging story. Many small touches in the game refer back to your adventures in the previous two games, and it is a pleasure to run into old friends and enemies as you battle to free the world of Sanctuary from evil.

Also, just because the loot-and-grind model doesn’t appeal to me, doesn’t mean it won’t appeal to you. I have good friends who are WoW raiders who absolutely love the gear grind in D3. If you enjoy raiding in MMOs you will likely enjoy it here too!

In closing, Diablo III launched with lofty expectations and, frankly, failed to deliver on most of them. I know that is harsh, but a company with a track record like Blizzard just doesn’t get to slide on past achievement. I wish I could give a more positive review of this game but it just doesn’t measure up. Blizzard, in their time, has revolutionized the Real-Time-Strategy, Action-RPG, and Massively Multiplayer genres. Diablo III is just more of the same from a company renowned for not simply delivering ‘the same.’

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