And our third round of cuts for SPFBO 10!
As always, let me preface this with the fact that all reading is subjective. So, what we didn’t like might be someone else’s favourite book, and if what you read here sounds like something you’d enjoy, please check them out!
Thank you very much to all the authors who entered, we know it is tough to get judged like this, and we definitely appreciate the courage to put your work forward to a contest!
If you have no idea what we’re talking about, you can read more about the contest here.
The Fall of Ahilon by Samantha Shaye
Forced to flee her kingdom, an Elvish princess prepares to return and reclaim her birthright with magic, blood, and steel.
When the Elvish kingdom of Ahilon is attacked, Princess Zaure Rhistel—the sole heir—is forced to flee. Her mother always told her when there is war prepare for death, but she didn’t listen. Now, she finds herself woefully unprepared for the challenges ahead.
Until she meets Torin, a spellcaster who has vowed to protect her. As Zaure travels with Torin, using her handmaiden’s name as an alias, two more heroes join their circle: Cagdas, a warrior from Zaure’s kingdom who was sent to aid her, and Alrik, a bard who has seen too many of the world’s evils.
Zaure has no choice but to trust and let the others in, as she will need their help pursuing the powerful enemy that has destroyed her kingdom.
The key to saving Ahilon is closer than she knows. Finding it is going to prove difficult. With the fate of her people in her hands, she will stop at nothing to save them.
Even if it means sacrificing herself.
Our Thoughts:
We had quite some books about princesses this year, but while we enjoyed some of them, we sadly didn’t really get on with this particualr one.
While we don’t mind a YA angle and a princess as main character, we just weren’t convinced about this one, and didn’t much care.
Said princess is 18, and theoretically old enough to fight for her kingdom. However, she often sounds like a 10 year old. Admittedly hobbits only come of age at 33 as she is an elf, so maybe she is a “kid” in her society, but then it’s off that she’s sent off all by herself. She seems really naive, and was a bit annoying to read really.
People also just change way too much. “Oh my, he is a murderer! How horrible!” one moment, and then fibbing with him two sentences later.
While it might definitely appeal to a different target audience, we will have to let it go.
After Silence by Natalie Northwood
Silence. Flames. Ashes.
For a thousand years, Halivaara has been on the brink of war, waiting for its catalyst. No one expects it to be a nineteen-year-old girl; no one expects Cerys Odessa.
Cerys is a healer hiding in the human lands of Norandia, where her kind is burned for trespassing. Born a human, her Spirit emerged when she was sixteen, far later than a mage’s should; but the problem isn’t that her magic was late. It’s that she isn’t supposed to have it at all.
As she hides her abilities from Norandia, conflicts rage outside. When the war finally reaches her village, Cerys and her companions find themselves in the heart—and ashes—of it all. But as she is thrust into a voyage across Halivaara to secure allies, she’ll uncover secrets that threaten not only her life, but the lives of everyone on the continent.
Because war is not their biggest threat.
She is.
Our Thoughts:
Patrick:
From my perspective, this one privileged style over character and worldbuilding. I was also unconvinced by the character motivations and unengaged by the story. Sorry, but definitely not for me. Hopefully it works for someone else.
Julia:
This shows a lot of promise, but doesn’t deliver on all of them.
The start was quite intriguing, with a nonhuman “Dweller” from “other lands than Norandia” falling from the sky, but miraculously still being alive.
So I immediately wondered about where and how different those other lands might be, what makes those Dwellers able to fly, and plenty more questions.
Some of these got answered, but overall the world building just stayed a bit vague, and didn’t hook nearly as much as I expected from the start.
The characters are interesting, but again at times a bit bland. What I really enjoyed was the friendship between our MC and her male best friend. That it just wasn’t a big deal if he was in her room, as he was just a friend, like a brother. I was very much enjoying the seemingly no romance angle, but we do get one, and then a pretty obvious one, later on in the book.
Overall it was a decent book I read to the end, with a lot of promise, but a few “first book niggles”.
Kerry: This was an easy and comfortable read which I read to completion. Everything in this novel felt very simplistic and lacked great depth. I would have liked to see a bit more about the different countries in this world rather than just fleeting glimpses. (though I guess an author could write too much about the world) & as often happens, the MC’s magic “surprise, surprise” developed exponentially when it was desperately needed. The xenophobia of the MC’s family was quite grating even when they knew their sister was like the magic wielding “others”.
I think a much younger reader than myself would enjoy this.
Calvin:
This one wasn’t for me. It felt like there wasn’t much depth to the worldbuilding or characters. While the opening had some intriguing possibilities, they didn’t come together in a way that motivated me to keep reading. My largest complaint would be that the characters felt one dimensional to me.
The Youngling by Stephen Harrington
Magic, mystery, and destinies entwine as two worlds collide.
In the world of The Midgarden, Synesthesia is the only Youngling. Orphaned as a child, her solace lies in the companionship of her loyal dog, Bron, and the tales within her cherished books. But an unexpected twist of fate alters her path forever when her uncle insists on her enrolment at the prestigious Academy.
On her treacherous journey, fate intervenes in the form of the enigmatic Griffinkat, a mysterious creature with the uncanny ability to delve into her thoughts, unravelling secrets she never knew existed. Within Synesthesia lies a power shrouded in the mists of time, a force that defies comprehension and beckons her to unlock its hidden potential.
In parallel narratives, Seth awakens in a foreign realm, his body battered and carrion birds circling ominously above. His rescue by a mysterious figure, sets in motion a mesmerizing saga that crosses the borders of worlds, unveiling mysteries and interconnected destinies.
Meanwhile, Brother Octavion, overseeing his monastery, catches sight of a blaze in the valley below. Investigating the aftermath, they discover the scorched remnants of a traveling show, the lone survivors being a peculiar girl shielding a dying boy. Villagers brand them as demons from hell, but their true identities remain shrouded in mystery.
In this mesmerizing novel, worlds collide, destinies intertwine, and secrets unfurl as the lives of Synesthesia, Seth, and Octavian converge in a captivating tale of magic, mystery, and destiny that transcends generations.
Our Thoughts:
We thought this book does have potential, but it’s not yet there. Our main problem is the prose, which just feels rough and didn’t really draw us in. Usually, if a book is good, you forget you are reading, and are fully immersed instead. Here we got snagged on clunky phrases, and there are just way too many sentences with the same names used over and over.
The other problem is how tropey it feels. While tropes themselves are fine, they weren’t handled very well here. We read and enjoyed other books in our batch which have a lot of tropes, however there they just felt smoothrt. More like a comforting familiar feeling, than a tired joke you have heard way too often.
There is an interesting story in here, but in our opinion the writing itself just needs more polishing.
The Will of the World by M.J. Lindemann
“May the will of the world guide your path.”
Plagued by the relentless husk, the populace must seek refuge behind barriers powered by crystal pylons provided by the Guild. But maintaining these safe havens comes at an extortionate price. As settlements are lost to greed, the tide of abominations surge, threatening to sweep humanity away.
Four lives intersect amidst the storm:
A mercenary with a penchant for thievery and a hunger for glory.
An assassin on a path of vengeance for her lost life.
A senator with machinations to save the world from inevitable collapse.
A mystic with immense potential and little control.
All four possess the power to save the world. Will their efforts avoid the coming calamity? Or incite catastrophe?
Our Thoughts:
Kerry:
There are some excellent ideas in The Will of the World and I enjoyed the science aspects just as much as the types of magic. People who enjoy a book that leans toward the creation of chimaera monsters and dark magic should pick this up, also if you enjoyed watching the rise and fall of despicable power figures.
Unfortunately I felt the book needed a bit more of a polish to make it as a semi-finalist but I did have a positive reading experience.
Patrick:
Despite some interesting, original ideas for magic and technology, I thought the writing wasn’t up to par, so it was a ‘no’ for me. It can be harsh in a contest, but it didn’t stand up enough compared to others in our batch to make it to the semifinals.
Julia:
Overall this was an interesting read, which kept me entertained enough to finish it. I enjoyed the complex politics, but found the writing style a bit too easy at times. Words and bits like “bro & sis”, running a “marathon” or “guiding a naughty child to a time-out chair” just didn’t fit, and kept throwing me out of the story. Same for the ”labour party” and “president Sanders”.
In a fully secondary world it just stands out like a sore thumb to me.
It mostly had a coming of age, almost YA feel to it, though there are some older main characters, and a few spicy scenes, though not overly graphic.
I did enjoy the world building, and there were quite some interesting turns, which kept me interested despite these flaws.
I also liked the characters, even if they are a bit too tropey for my taste at times. We have not just one, but two very overpowered young men, a stone cold assassin, the bad politicians, and everything you’d expect.
The LGBT inclusiveness was a definite plus, with a bidding m/m romance, which just isn’t a big deal to anyone.
All in all a book with a lot of promise, which could have done with a bit more polishing and editing.
Embargo on Hope by Justin Doyle
Even gods have secrets…
On planet Vastire, worth is set by the sins of one’s ancestors. Good families rise to the elite and the wicked fall into poverty. Unfortunately for sixteen-year-old Darynn Mark, his father incited a revolution. Now, Darynn scrounges his way through life in the slums. When Vastire is surrounded by an embargo, it gets even harder to survive.
That all changes when an alien ship slips through the embargo, seeking Darynn with an offer: finish the revolution and the embargo ends. He might have a chance thanks to mysterious magic powers, and his two companions: clairvoyant crush Fyra and soldierly alien Kaylaa.
Cutthroat killers, mystical beasts, Vampires, power-hungry priests and lords, and self-serving spies stand in their way. If the three of them can crack his father’s secret, maybe they can end the embargo and save the poor. If not, another poor orphan will be added to the growing piles of dead.
Our Thoughts:
Calvin:
This had an interesting premise, but a slow start, an annoying (to me) MC, and ultimately it felt much more science fiction than fantasy.
Kerry:
I completed this book but I didn’t really read it, instead I found myself skipping paragraphs and only reading certain scenes. It was an easy enough read to grasp what was happening and I enjoyed the mix of Sci-fi & Fantasy. My problem with this book was how ‘convenient” things were; off to jail the MC discovers his magic, chased by Militia, a handy tree with a large enough crack to hide, remembered by the MC.
Also the supposedly really sick sister manages to go on a gruelling trek.
If you like a mix of SFF and (I say tentatively) a Star Wars lite mixed with Indian Jones then I think you’d enjoy this.
Julia:
Embargo of Hope by Justin Doyle is a blend of sci-fi and fantasy, that felt skewered towards sci-fi to me.
I was intrigued by the world and easily drawn in, but sadly the farther I read, the less engaged I was. I can’t really exactly point out what the problem was, mostly I didn’t care for the characters enough to be fully invested in their fate I think.
It’s a pretty epic scale, so you need to pay attention to follow, but it’s not a hard read.
T. O. Munro