When writing fantasy we are always looking for ways to bring color, culture and a unique perspective to the world we create. Although we try to avoid clichés, we can often change or use colloquialisms to add flavor to our writing.
Down Under we have our own set of sayings that are common to our language. As we travel around we come across more colorful and inventive words and phrases to add to available material. It often happens that until my editor questions a certain turn of phrase, I don’t even realize it is an Australian colloquialism.
Anyhow, I was hoping during December to share some of our sayings. It would be great to end the year on a lighthearted topic. Please feel free to share your favorite sayings too. If you could mention where they originate from, that would be awesome. For this article I asked friends for help. Here is what I gathered. I wonder if they are only used here in Australia, or more widely. They seem like common English to me.
Dry as a dead dingo’s donger. (thirsty)
Flat out like a lizard drinking. (busy)
Going off like a frog in a sock. (upset)
Running around like a chook without its head. (disorganized)
Tight as a fish swimming backwards. (miserly)
A man on a galloping horse wouldn’t notice the difference. (it’ll do)
Not the brightest light in the harbor. (harbour in Australia) And in the UK – Ed.
Not the sharpest crayon in the pack. (stupid)
Two bob short of a quid. (stupid)
How’s that for a bunch of bananas? (good)
Same old, same old. (the usual)
Good and proper. Used in “You got me good and proper.” (you win)
It stinks like a koala’s arse. (bad smell)
It could kill a brown dog. (bad taste/smell)
Kick up a stink. (make a fuss)
It’s a dog’s breakfast. (mess)
On the blink. (broken)
As slow as a month of Sundays. Or, Slow as a wet week. (Time dragging)
Would blow a dog off a chain. (windy)
Don’t get your knickers in a knot. (calm down)
Be that as it may… (offering another point of view)
Makes no never mind. (doesn’t matter)
Don’t get off your bike, I’ll pick up the pump. (calm down)
Words can have two meanings even within the same country. For a simple example ‘scallops’ in NSW are potato coated in batter and deep fried. In Victoria, our neighbor state, scallops are a type of sea food while ‘potato cakes’ are potato coated in batter and deep fried. It makes it confusing when you order incorrectly.
And finally, in answer to Murphy’s Law, I heard of Sod’s Law, “Even if something can’t go wrong, it does go wrong.”
So, now it’s your turn. Do you have any local terms or sayings would you like to share?
Kellie Doherty
Richard Marpole
Another brilliant article! A lot of our colloquialisms in the UK are much like yours (which I guess should be expected to a point,) except, where you guys have ‘tight as a fish swimming backwards,’ we would probably say, ‘tighter than a duck’s arse’ to describe someone who’s mean with their money. In fact I think a lot of ours a pretty rude:
‘rough as a badger’s arse,’ for when you’re not feeling great,
‘piece of piss’ to say something’s easy and,
‘built like a brick shit house,’ to describe someone who looks rather tough.
Fun stuff!
A few sayings from the north east of England
“I’ve seen more fat on a butcher’s pencil.” – about/to a skinny person.
“No stranger to a bag of chips!” – about/to a fat person.
“Well, I’ll go the foot of our stairs.” – I’m surprised.
“As thick as two short planks!” – stupid
“Hadaway and shite!” – I don’t believe you/You’re joking!
Some American ones:
The elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor (stupid)
The light is on but there’s nobody home (stupid)
When God said brains he/she thought they said rain and hid behind the door (stupid)
Couch potato (lazy)
Props to you (recognition)
Cougar (woman over 40 dating younger man)
Peeps (coworkers, friends but usually coworkers)
We have many in the USA, depends on the area of the country, too.
A few other ones from the North East, to add to Akapaoloverdi’s list above.
‘Never in the creation of crow shit’ exclamation of unpleasant surprise (works best when said in a pitman’s accent, with the rolling r’s).
‘Close enough for council work’ It’s not perfect, but it’ll do.
‘His wife/gf/mother’s 3 and 2’ An annoying bloke. It indicates 3rd favourite tit and 2nd favourite twat.
‘As thick as pig shit.’ Extremely stupid.
‘She’s got radar tits’ Never a long time without finding male company.
Most of the others I can think of are a case of dialect, rather than colloquialism. If we were going the dialect route, I could be hear all day.
How about
– Happy as a clam at high tide (safe)
– Let’s not be pickin’ gnat shit out of pepper here (don’t be so picky)
– A two dollar haircut on a ten-cent head (useless/tacky)
ROFL
These are awesome. Thanks for sharing.. Shows how colorful and interesting our language can be.
Yesterday the converstation turned to colloquialisms… again… among the people I interviewed. They wanted to include “Crook as Rookwood” which is specifically a Sydney side saying, since Rookwood is the cemetery there!! So, being crook as Rookwood… sick as a dog… or feeling like death. Hmm.
Even a ‘schooner’ a beer glass size, changes here, from state to state… Of course the topic turned to beer, being one of our first hot summer days.
As a topic it’s a great converstation starter and I was ready to take notes.
I must challenge Paul’s definition of “Built like a brick shithouse” … I have always heard it used to describe a well-endowed female (synonym for “stacked”). And in the U.S. (at least any part of it where I’ve been) “scallops” are a variety of seafood.
The U.S. has a lot of regional terms … for instance, a carbonated beverage is “soda” on the east coast, but “pop” in the midwest. But the one that gets me, I think it’s mostly a southern expression, is “sure don’t” to express negation or disagreement. Where I come from, just about anything starting with “sure …” is signifying agreement, and the first few times I ran into “sure don’t” got me very confused.
I love these. Here are some from South Wales (the old one, not the new one):
Damp as a mermaid’s flip-flop (wet)
Gomping (ugly/terrible)
Fatty’s Leg (beyond repair/reconciliation)
Goodnight Irene (death/goodbye for good)
Bag of spanners (stupid)
Wouldn’t kick her out of bed for farting (she’s hot)
Ah Jim, in England ‘Built like a brick shithouse,’ definitely means stacked but in the sense of being big, solid and tank-like. Describe a girl like that and you’re either saying she’s built like a body builder or she’s very large and probably square. Either way, you’re more than likely calling her a monstrosity and will be wearing a slapped face in seconds.
Here, if someone’s built like a brick shithouse then they are definitely who you want to be hiding behind in the middle of a bar fight. 😀
These are so much fun! Some more U.S. ones (I live in the “deep South”):
– “That there horse.” – That horse over there.
– “Stick that in your pipe and smoke it.” – Take that!
– “Put my face on.” – Put on makeup.
– “Put some elbow grease into in.” – Put some force into it (like when opening a jar, for instance).
Adriana
A few of those we use in the Southern United States. “Same old, same old”, and we have variations of a few others. Most of those were new to me, and I loved the images they provoked. Down here, one of my favorites is “It don’t make no never mind no way,” (it doesn’t matter), “If the Good Lord’s willing and the creek don’t rise” (assurance that something will be done) “that ole’ dog won’t hunt” (used that excuse one time too many). I love language. I love words. Collecting sayings is wonderful, don’t you think? Oh, and Jim, in the South, a carbonated drink’s a coke, not a soda. Don’t make no never mind what kind it is. No, it sure don’t.
This is lots of fun.
Are all odd sayings colloquialisms? If so, can I play, from Oz 🙂 ?
A blind man would be pleased to see it (good but not perfect)
Not the full quid (someone who isn’t very bright)
I’m as happy as a pig in mud: I’m over the moon: on cloud nine (ecstatic)
He’s lost it. (having a breakdown)
She’ll be apples (It will be alright)
Chucked a mental (lost his temper)
They’re having a blue (arguing)
I have a favourite saying my son uses when the weather is steamy hot and humid… “it’s like breathing in someone else’s lung.” I am not sure if it’s a colloquialism, but it’s so descriptive.
Let’s not be pickin’ gnat shit out of pepper here… 🙂
Even if these are not colloquialisms but dialect, or just odd sayings.. they add colour to our language and we should be able to put them to work in our writing.
These are so fun! A friend of mine said one she’s heard in Montana is “hornier than a three-peckered goat.” I almost passed out from laughing when she said that.
I’m enjoying this, so here are a few more:-
“He’s not as green as he is cabbage-looking!” – He’s not as naive as he he looks!
“He’s spat his dummy out!” – He’s in a mood! (Also he’s thrown teddy out the pram!)
“A blind man on a galloping horse could have seen that!” – That’s obvious.
and please don’t read on if you’re easily offended:_
“she’s had enough cock to put a hand rail along Hadrian’s Wall!” – she’s a tad promiscuous!
I am off for a day to two… like a rat up a drain pipe. No internet!! I shall return… hopefully very soon. Keep them coming. They are terrific.
My favourite Northern/midlands uk saying: ” it’s looking a bit black over Bill’s Mother’s…”
Meaning that5there’s a gathering of black clouds – pertaining to weather.
Have we had the lovely Ozism – “bangs like a dunny door”? – meaning a promiscuous person.
A few from the southern US:
Now we are cooking with gas. = Usually some sort of improvement
Can’t build a shit house on a shanty = You need a good foundation for a project
Colder than a witch’s tit with a brass nipple = cold outside
Colder than a well diggers arse = cold outside
Like reaching around your arse to scratch your elbow = doing something easy the hard or stupid way
Couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket = Can’t sing
Fish or cut bait = quit wasting time
Shit or get off the pot = quit wasting time
Best thing since sliced bread = good thing
Straighten up and fly right = quit screwing up (Got that from my dad a lot in school)
Slicker than whale shit on an ice flow = slippery, either a person or a surface
That dawg (dog) won’t hunt = someone is using bad logic or lying
From here to the fence post = won’t tell anyone else about something or to keep a secret
Dead as a door nail = dead
Dumb as a door knob = dumb
Thanks,
–louis
Tight as a gnat’s chuff = miserly (also short arms and deep pockets)
Face like a bag of spanners = ugly
Bit of a Nora = a woman who, if she fell asleep on your arm you’d gnaw an arm off to get away
Like shit off a shovel = speedy
The cat’s pyjamas = the bee’s knees
Feeling like a spare prick at a wedding = feeling useless
Face like a smacked arse = red-faced with outrage/indignation
Pussy-struck = speechless
Herding cats = something that is nigh-on impossible, and fruitless even to try
Blowing a hooley = extremely windy
Coming down in stair-rods = of rain, torrential
Brass monkeys = extremely cold, as in cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey
This is fun – I’ll have to try and think of a few more!
I thought of some more Aussie ones.
I couldn’t give a brass razoo = I don’t care [enough to give a worthless coin.]
One foot in the grave and the other on a banana skin = old.
Clear as mud = Confusing
I see, said the blind man to his deaf son = confused.
Drongo = halfwit.
Banana bender = Queenslander.
Fair crack of the whip ( one of my Dad’s favourites) = Don’t push it
You little humdinger = referring to something that is excellent. But my dad said it refers to the dunny cart.
This one I hadn’t heard until I came across it, just now, and it made me laugh
He wouldn’t know a tram was up him ’til the bell rang! = very stupid.
Mish, I hadn’t heard your Ozism before, but it made me laugh.
A couple more from my part of Oz:
You look as though you’ve been dragged through a sick cow backwards (Not looking good)
Colder than a num’s tit (Very cold)
Wouldn’t work in an iron lung (lazy as can be)
Neither your arse or your elbow (Neither one thing or the other)
Cracked a darkie (Ranting and raving)
Pulled a swiftie (Cheated someone)
I had fun making some up for my fantasy novel King’s Envoy. I didn’t want to use cliches or really well-known US or UK sayings, but fantasy worlds would have such sayings too. Also I had to avoid anything relating to our mechanized, technological world. Some I came up with were:
Instead of ‘you’re flogging a dead horse’ (what you are doing is useless) I decided on ‘you’re pissing on a dead tree’. (or watering a dead tree, if you’re prudish!)
Instead of ‘he has a chip on his shoulder’ (he’s feeling hard done by) I used ‘he has a burr under his saddle’.
Instead of ‘tighter than a duck’s arse, or a fish swimming backwards, (he/she is mean) I used ‘tighter than a whore’s purse.’
And instead of using words like ‘thick’ or idiot, I used ‘lackwit’, although that one’s not my own invention.
These are great Cas. The perfect example of how to make Fantasy writing colourful! Thanks for sharing.
Thanks everyone for participating.
I am ‘as happy as a pig in mud’ to be back! 🙂