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Author Topic: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread  (Read 15653 times)

Offline JMack

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RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« on: May 24, 2015, 06:14:20 PM »
Black Jaymack slouched on his unseen throne, and considered his options. He could ignore the offer from this new church of Atku - an offer of a vast treasure, incredible dangers and the end of the damned Fantasia domination of his lands - or he could listen to the bard sing another lay about Bloody Halfhand the scourge of the North.

"Stop your damned yowling!" he yelled at the man, "or I'll stop it for you."

The feasting hall was empty, except for Jaymack, the bard and Jaymack's pet dragon, Smug. The dragon was hungry. The bard had driven off everyone. Hungry dragon. Irritating bard. Simple arithmetic.

Except that Jaymack desperately needed new fighters, new heroes to help him with this mission from this so-called "prophet." Because, face facts, what had once been his father's kingdom before the armies of Fantasia invaded twenty years ago was now just a remote province of Fantasia and Jaymack only had his father's sword. No money, no named men, no second, no nothing. Just the sword and the dragon. Well, Bloody Halfhand had started with less.

"Bard!" he called.  "I need you to spread this word among your brother and sister singers and news tellers. Black Jaymack, King of the North, is looking for heroes to fight against the tyranny of Fantasia and its Saphiric church. No more will the common man be ground under the jackbooted heel of the tyrant."

"Um, sir? We're not allowed to use the word tyrant for the king." The bard was very apologetic.

"What exactly are you allowed to say?"

"Well, I could probably get away with 'smoothed under the leather sole of his most blessed servant of the dragon.'"

"I don't think that will do. It has to attract my target audience. If you change the advertising message, I'll get Fantasia patriots, or Saphiric devotees, or even just football hoodlums from the village of Liverpool. And those people are crazy."

"Is that a problem?"

Jaymack rolled his eyes and unclipped the chain from Smug's collar.

While the dragon reintroduced true feasting to the vast, dusty room, Jaymack made his way down dim, damp stairs to his father's nearly empty treasury room. There was one last scroll lying on a shelf, protected by ancient wax seals and bearing inside of it a great magic. The spell of "Forumication". With it, Jaymack believed he could get the word out.

He broke the seals and stared at the gibberish written there in what seemed like it must be human blood. Or maybe a fine-line red pen.

"Thopis opis thope spopell opof Foporopumopicopatiopon. Spopeak fropiend, opand opall wopill lopistopen."

What shite. But, Jaymack sounded it out and finally felt he had it right. At his words, the scroll burst into flame and a great window opened in his mind. Somehow he knew that while spell lasted, he could speak to interested souls in the entire universe. In a voice like a whisper of silk on the wind, his words were carried to the four corners of Fantasia:

"FRIENDS, THE TIME HAS COME TO TAKE BACK OUR LANDS FROM THE TYRANT KING OF FANTASIA AND HIS CRONIES THE PRELATES AND PRIESTS OF THE DRAGON-KISSING SAPHIRIC CHURCH. And there's a lot of money available too. Black Jaymack is looking for a few good heroes to take on the tyrant and his picked team of villains. I need a wizard, a thief, a powerful fighter and a new bard. Plus anyone else who can show they have a zest for adventure, a love of freedom and a talent for killing. Meet me at Schrolling's Hall in the old kingdom of the North. When we are assembled, I will explain our quest. Oh, and you will receive 50 pieces of gold just for taking our tour, no commitment necessary, you do not have to purchase to participate."

Of course Jaymack didn't have 5 gold pieces, no less 500 or so, but he'd have to figure out that problem later. And the fact that it was this crazy new church of Atku that was behind this? Well, they didn't need to know that either.

Black Jaymack slouched on his unseen throne and waited for the heroes to arrive.
« Last Edit: May 24, 2015, 06:17:22 PM by Jmack »
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Offline ScarletBea

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #1 on: May 24, 2015, 10:18:47 PM »
'Mr. Jaymack, hey mr. Jaymack'
What was that annoying voice coming from the back of the room?

'What do you want? Come closer'

A figure inside a voluminous red cape approached and piped 'I heard you're recruiting. Some ongoing quest, I take it?
I'd like to join you, but I'm afraid I don't have any special skills, nor know anyone else in this town'

Jaymack thought his luck might be changing - not even half a day had passed since his plea had gone out, and people were already applying?
He just wished he could better see her face... but beggars can't be choosers, and so he opened his arms..
'Welcome to the fold, I'm sure you've heard about the payment? After the tour only, I'm afraid'

'Oh thank you kind sir, I'm sure I'll be able to help'


Scarlet smirked inwards - such a gullible dark lord! In her days dark lords used to be much more suspicious, but that's all you got nowadays. No quality. Doc would be happy with her...
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Offline JMack

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #2 on: May 25, 2015, 12:06:55 AM »
"And this is my father's coin collection. Well, it's the labels for the coin collection. I used the coins to pay the property tax on the castle last year."

Oh my gods, thought Scarlet. This was going to be harder than she thought. Was there no end to this tour? Empty armory,  empty library, empty collections room, empty larder. Chilly was really going to have to be grateful. I need to change the pace here.

"Mr. Jaymack," she started, "I'm so very impressed will all this, but you didn't bring me here just for the tour."

"Well, I am looking for some renters. I tried putting an advertisement on Crag's List, but the one guy who showed up asked if his mother could pay for him. Then I tried -"

"Jaymack," interrupted Scarlett. "What's the mission?"

The little king blushed. "Yeah, sorry. Okay, here's the deal. The north was conquered by Fantasia twenty years ago and lost its freedom to the southern tyrants. Now an unnamed sponsor has stepped forward to fund an expedition whose outcome could free the North."

"Where do I fit in?"

"Well, I'm not sure. You said you don't really have any skills, so I just thought you were here for the 50 gold pieces. Do you have any skills I can use? I really need a wizard. Meanwhile, have you met my dragon?"

Scarlet almost jumped out of her skin as she smelled the hem of her robe smoldering.

"Don't worry. He's quite tame, except with people who try my patience."
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Offline Henry Dale

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #3 on: May 25, 2015, 11:23:27 AM »
Henry arrived too late for the tour and wandered around aimlessly near the empty throne room.
Bloody hell, he had wanted those 50 coins. Of course joining forces with this Jaymack was only a ruse to steal the Dragon Diamond from the fortress. Once he got that, he would be off to some distant land with neko girls, bright lights and a decent internet connection.

***

After what must've been an eternity- this wasn't even worth 50 coins- Jaymack came back into the throne room with a red-robed woman in his wake.

"Who are you and what do you want?!"

Henry blinked. "I heard you're contracting people. Isn't that what you do?"
Jaymack made a face. "Oh right, that I do. I forgot. Still, question stands."

This was most awkward.
"I am Henry the Jack, master burglar. No, I'm not a hobbit. I believe my talents could be essential for your cause, if the payment is good, of course.

Offline JMack

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #4 on: May 25, 2015, 12:31:10 PM »
So let's roll back the clock a smidge. Before Ms. Scarlet returned to Dr. chill, and before Henri Jacque appeared. Just a smidge. Because things of importance had occurred while on the Tour.

"He's sort of cute, if you like that sort of thing," thought Scarlet. In kind of a little brother sort of way. But the dragon was not well-behaved. She pulled her skirts away and swatted out the embers on the edges. He also seemed a little... hmm, clueless. Like he really didn't know what was going on.

"I can't believe you have no talents," said Black JayMack, "Can you knit?"

Oh. Maybe not so clueless.

"Can you magic this?" And he threw something at her head. Scarlet twisted her fingers instinctively, and the object flared and popped out of existence.

"That was rude!" she complained.

"What? I thought you might like a grape." The little bastard popped a small purple globe into his mouth from a bunch hidden behind his back. Smug reached up a delicate lip and snatched the fruit, making it disappear in one gulp.

"So, I'm a wizard, what of it?" snapped Scarlet.

"I need a wizard."

"Well, I'm not sure this job's for me." The poor man's face actually fell. S. had read the expression in books but never really seen it in life. Oh heck. "Look. I can't stay, at least not right now. And maybe I'll be back. But," and she paused, thinking Chill won't like this," maybe I can help."

S. pulled an old birthday popper from a pocket on her robe. "I bought this from an old tinker and thought I'd get around to studying it one day. But, here. Have a go."

"What does it do?" JayMack turned the frilly object around curiously. It was a tube of some sort, with a colorful paper wrapper tied off with ribbon at each end.

"You pull the little paper tab hidden on one side, and you get a birthday surprise."

"It's not my birthday."

Scarlet rolled her eyes. "Pretend."

JayMack looked a bit puzzled, but then he shrugged. He fumbled with the paper on each end until he found something to pull. With a CRAKC! the party favor exploded in a burst of green light and showered emerald clover around the room. A piece of green paper twirled and drifted to the floor. JayMack bent down to pick it up, and when he straightened, he realized the woman in red was gone.

Muttering to himself, JayMack made his way back to his hall and his invisible throne. A man stood there. Tall, with prematurely white hair.. He had a twichy eye, but  looked pretty sharp, dressed in leathers and soft shoes.

"Who are you?" JayMack asked.

------

Which brings us back to the present moment, of course. And our story resumes.

"Well, HenriJ," said the little king. "I think I may have just the start for us. Take a look at this." He held out a small piece of green paper.

Henry the Jack took it and read the letters printed there:

Quote
My dear son,
I am sorry I could not leave you more at first to help you reclaim our kingdom. But I had to keep our greatest treasures hidden from the invaders. The treasury in the castle is not my true treasure room. Your inheritance is secreted in the deepest recesses of...

The note cut off with a melodramatic squiggly line.

Well, thought the Jack. This could be interesting.
« Last Edit: May 25, 2015, 12:37:14 PM by Jmack »
Change, when it comes, will step lightly before it kicks like thunder. (GRMatthews)
You are being naive if you think that any sweet and light theme cannot be strangled and force fed it's own flesh. (Nora)
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Offline ultamentkiller

Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #5 on: May 25, 2015, 04:07:14 PM »
Justin timidly entered The Throne Room. He was quite surprised there were no guards outside of the door. No one to announce his arrival. He almost turned around and went back home. It worked well for him though. Better to lurk at the back of the room and get a feel for what's going on. Better to be sure who this Jaymac really was before making his decision. Pressing himself to the wall, he cloaked himself in shadows, hiding from prying eyes.

Offline JMack

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #6 on: May 25, 2015, 05:49:18 PM »
JayMack thought he felt a breeze stir. Breaking off from his discussion with Hanry the Jack, he checked the front door. Hmm. He looked over at Smug, who should have barked? or something if anyone was there. The dragon was lying on his back in the sun, sleeping.

Ok, nothing, he guessed and went back to his conversation.
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You are being naive if you think that any sweet and light theme cannot be strangled and force fed it's own flesh. (Nora)
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Offline ScarletBea

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #7 on: May 25, 2015, 05:55:09 PM »
Scarlet could sense the result of her sabotaging attempts.
The sleeping spell she had put on the mangy dog walking outside Jaymack's castle had worked, combined with the spell that made that dog look extremely tasty for dragons.
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Offline Henry Dale

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #8 on: May 25, 2015, 06:07:13 PM »
Henry looked at Jaymack's odd behaviour as he went around the front door. What an odd little man...
Meanwhile the woman in red who hadn't introduced herself stared lucidly into the distance.
Had this been a mistake? Perhaps joining the kingdom of Fantasia was the better option?
Henry decided to wait things out for the moment. Perhaps things would get interesting soon. If not, he could write that fairy tale, he should've finished that ages ago, but this procrastination was fun.
He ignored all the shadows stirring around the room. Obviously others would gather here, to spectate, biding their time. Then, a roar came from outside.
« Last Edit: May 25, 2015, 06:09:20 PM by Henry Dale »

Offline JMack

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #9 on: May 25, 2015, 06:25:45 PM »
Smug the miniature dragon, who had been dozing in the sun, leapt up and dove for cover under the Unseen Throne.

JayMack sighed. "There goes another guard dog. Thankfully there's no gold here to really attract a full sized dragon." He glanced quickly at the Jack. "Whoops."

"No gold? What about the fifty pieces we were promised?!"

"I know, I know. But look at this note. There's a real treasure here, buried beneath the castle. I'll split it with you, 50/50 if you find it."
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Offline Raptori

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #10 on: May 25, 2015, 10:50:47 PM »
The cat's tail twitched, and she sniffed at the air. The stench of the dragon had changed somehow--perhaps her chance would come soon. She crept across the rafters, drifting through the shadows, until she reached a spot just above the throne. She stretched, then settled down and started licking her paws, her steady amber gaze intent on the scene below.

She watched.

She waited.
« Last Edit: May 25, 2015, 10:52:55 PM by Raptori »
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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #11 on: May 26, 2015, 01:45:42 AM »
Kassin had been awoken from his slumber by the force of a call. He had first assumed he had been dreaming, but there was no mistaking it. This had been a Blood Call.

He stretched his wings lazily without slowing his ambling run towards the source. Kassin had never expected the creatures of this plane – humans, they called themselves – to possess the technology and knowledge to make blood runes. His own people had abandoned that archaic technology some 300 turns ago, but it was the first time Kassin witnessed the humans making anything dubbed as "evolved" on his home planet.

He was definitely investigating that Call.
He felt the Pull himself. Because of the line "anyone else who can show they have a zest for adventure, a love of freedom and a talent for killing". It probably was the only reason the Call had touched him, for Kassin was no wizard, no thief and certainly no one's fighter.
His best songs would also probably make the sensitive humans' ear drums bleed.

As he approached the source of the Call, Kassin realised a lot of scum had been attracted there. The place reeked, and not only of the very apparent decay.
Dragons were lurking around. Those made Kassin uncomfortable. They looked like the children he might have, if he ever impregnated a scaly tree lizard. They were incredibly dumb and clueless, but breathed fire. Not a good mix.
The place also smelled of cats, human sweat and the thick scent of charred flesh. Whatever was going on in there, Kassin would find out.
« Last Edit: May 26, 2015, 01:49:21 AM by Nora »
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Offline Lady Ty

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #12 on: May 26, 2015, 04:29:13 AM »
The door flew back with a thud and a small round personage strode in and looked Jaymack up and down.

"Well, I'm here" she said. "But if you think an IOU for 50 gold pieces is going to tempt me, you better think double. 100 gold and a new hat on Hogswatchnight and written and witnessed. Is that clear? Name of Oggy, include that in the contract and make sure you spell it properly, none of that Boggie or Poggie....."

"B b b but, hang on there," stammered Jaymack", cutting in as quickly as he could.  "Yöu don't look like a wizard or a hero or a fighter, but maybe you're a bard? I really need one of those because ..........."

"Don't be ridiculous, I'm tone deaf and only listen to Queen and Sigur Ros, nothing else is any good. Stop wasting my time, man," snapped Oggy. " I'm a cook of course, how are you possibly going to keep a band together without feeding them, do you expect them to spend those IOU's on food for themselves? Where's the kitchen, all my gear is on a wheelbarrow outside and I haven't got all day, it must be nearly dinnertime and I know you'll all have food fads and I'll try to accommodate even the paleo nutters.  And you better have a telly in the kitchen or I won't be pleased and I don't suppose you've put in a grocery order and I'll have to make do with some rubbish like crabwings and squirrelnuts and even then.... "

Jaymack pointed quickly to a door, hoping to shut her up and  and Oggy bustled off, still gabbling away.  Smug crawled out from under the throne and lolloped after Oggy with a draggony grin......
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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #13 on: May 26, 2015, 10:24:41 AM »
The cat trotted outside to catch a few rays of sunlight, and proceeded to wash herself.  Suddenly she sat up, her tail wagging, her eyes alert. A portal opened in front of her and there was a frightened bleating as a goat stepped out with a slightly awkward gait. It trotted off into the building still bleating.  Behind the goat came a man dressed as a late 18th century French nobleman.  "Ah! Monsewer Charlie's lucky jour! First un goat, now un chat pour dis nobleman's pleasures!" the nobleman gushed whilst slightly worryingly gyrating his hips.
"Sod this for a game of dungeons and dragons," the cat thought and transformed itself into a hissing velicoraptor.
The nobleman didn't seem put off and merely pulled a mishappen book out of his bag. "Mon amour! I stole dis from the great library of ze Elfy imself. It is is a well thumbed copy of Ravished by a Raptor from his well renowned erotica section."
"Shit!" the velicoraptor cursed and transformed into the form of a buxom barbarian woman in a animal fur bikini.
"Grow a beard and I might consider it," snapped the nobleman in a disappointed voice before stepping back through the portal which promptly closed after him.
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Offline Rukaio_Alter

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Re: RPG 2015: Jmack's Recruiting Thread
« Reply #14 on: May 26, 2015, 11:46:35 AM »
While Jaymack and HenriJ chatted about the green note, unbeknownst to them, in the rafters above, Arcane Gray lay silently taking notes. His familiar, Alter, hovered beside him in spirit form, invisible to all except his summoner.

"'The treasury in the castle is not my true treasure room. Your inheritance is secreted in the deepest recesses of...' It trails off there." Alter's voice reverberated in Arcane's head. "What do you think? It sounds like the sort of place someone would hide a summoning scroll."

Arcane let out a low grunt to register he'd heard without giving away his position. His instinct was correct. Spying on this 'Jaymack' character had provided him with a few good leads. Obviously, he had no intention of getting involved in this foolish crusade against Fantasia though. All that mattered to him was finding those lost scrolls and staying out of trouble to the best of his ability. And possibly finding a way to keep Oxford quiet. And provided no-one interfered with that-

"Um, Master?" Alter interrupted. "I think we have a mild problem."

Arcane turned to see that Smug, the tiny dragon, had clambered onto the rafters and was now looking at him with a curious expression.

Uh oh.

"Nice dragon..." Arcane said quietly, moving to pet Smug with a nervous hand. "Don't mind me..."

Smug stared at Arcane's hand. Then the beam he was sitting on. He coughed once, spitting a few small embers.

Arcane's eyes widened. "Don't you do it."

Smug coughed up a few more embers. An acrid smell of smoke filled the air.

"Don't you do it."

Smug smiled. Then he spat a glob of flame onto the beam.

"I think he did it."

"You basta-!"

The burning beam collapsed sending Arcane plummeting onto the floor in a mess of ash and dust. Through Alter's brief intervention, he was able to slow his fall enough to avoid serious injury, but he still landed with a painful thump. Groaning, he sat up to see Jaymack and HenriJ staring at him.

"Apparently we've been discovered." Alter said dryly.

Arcane let out a low grumble before getting to his feet. Luckily, he had been drilled by his father on exactly what to do when caught with his hand in the metaphorical cookie jar. Filled with sweet, delicious metaphorical cookies that would melt in your mouth were they not abstract representations of a concept and thus inedible.

Anyway, the point was, he was going to bluff like a motherfucker.

"Sorry to interrupt. Is the residency of Black Jaymack?" Arcane asked.

Jaymack nodded slowly, a little confused. Arcane walked over and shook his hand.

"Good to meet you. I heard you were looking for aid to help take down the King of Fantasia." Arcane smiled. "I would like to personally offer my services."

Jaymack blinked and looked Arcane up and down. He was skinny, small and with not a single ounce of muscle to be seen.

"I was hoping for someone less..." He thought about his words carefully. "...twig-like."

"Oh, I'm not suggesting I fight." Arcane said. "That would be silly." Besides, he had 3 summons to deal with that. "But you said you were looking for a bard to help you?"

"Ah." Jaymack nodded. "That's right. Okay then, give me a demonstration."

Arcane blinked. "A demonstration?"

"Of your musical skills." Jaymack looked around. "You did bring your instrument with you, right?"

"..."

"Leave me out of this one."

"Well... I don't need an instrument..." Arcane tried bluffing. "Because... I am the instrument?"

"What, so you whistle?"

"Yeeeesss..."

"Alright then, demonstrate that."

"S-Sure."

"This should be good."

<One impromptu and improvised whistling session later>

Jaymack sat in deep thought. Then he spoke.

"That was quite possibly the worst thing I've ever heard."

"Ah," Arcane cut in. "But you never specified I had to be a good bard, did you?"

Jaymack opened his mouth. Then shut it again. "Point taken. Oh well, I'm sure I can find some use for you somewhere."

Suddenly, Henri, who had been standing quietly in the background, spoke up.

"So... am I the only one still wondering about the roof?"
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