Fantasy Faction

Fantasy Faction Writers => RPG - Fantasy Faction Style => Topic started by: JMack on May 29, 2015, 02:01:25 AM

Title: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on May 29, 2015, 02:01:25 AM
HERE BEGINNETH THE THREAD
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Doctor_Chill on May 29, 2015, 02:31:30 AM
BUT WHAT IS HAPPENING IN YOUR THREAD. NOTHING HAHA.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on May 29, 2015, 02:39:24 AM
While JayMack's father was distracted, Karrin used his own Anti-shadow Tech to blast a whole straight through the quivering mass of the giant. The former king's skull flew out of the engorged creature and rolled to a smoking stop at Smug's feet. The little dragon ate it in one snap of his jaws, crunching it between his powerful three rows of teeth. The monster screamed and dissolved into a puddle, crying out with its last breath: "The hips! The hips!"

But Smug was spitting and belching and whining for its foul snack. He hid under Oggy's robes.

JayMack called to his now reunited crew of heroes. "I don't know how we got here, or what's really happening, but I don't think that howling Frenchman out there is good news at all. Everyone into this convenient light house here. We need to get our act together. It's time to finally tell you our mission and to share out the treasures that Justin is hoarding over in the corner."
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Lady Ty on May 29, 2015, 09:12:55 AM
Everyone gathered in the lighthouse and gathered their breathe, wits and bits together. Oggy seemed to have arrived with hampers and parcels despite getting entangled with the Zombie King.

"You can eat while you plan "she said, settling KingkillerJaymack in the centre of the circle.
“Here you go, Kingy, get your choppers round these Oriole Mollylands with sourcorn fritters, that’ll go down a treat with this good slug of Wild Lurkers to put some spit in your whistle. Now, you’re the boss, so just remember – Scuto cibi egregiae voluntatis tuae coronasti nos and for all you ignorant lot who can’t speak Klingonian that means  “ with  excellent grub you’ll get your crown”.

She turned and called Smug to help drag a large wrapped package to Kassin .
“Here you are wyrmkin, think this will suit, and there’s a cask of Chateau Sang de Buffles just near the wall.” The package looked very large, bloodily bloody and smelt gross.  Kassin gave her a terrifying toothy grin, his teeth gleaming  and gnashing  together. He looked at Smug making gruff grunts and the dragon laughed so hard he began to fart stinky green smoke.  Oggy looked questioningly at Smug. So he burbled quickly and quietly into her ear.

“Oh, mytripe and onions, that wasn’t very nice and the King would be very upset to hear about it. In any case we need him as our leader and he may need an heir one day for his kingdom. Tell Kassin to keep those thoughts to himself "

She gave the tigerthingy a severely hard Paddington stare.  Everyone nearby pretended they hadn’t heard a thing but clustered round the hampers, poking around and peering inside.

“Shoo you lot, get back and don’t mess up. “Oggy laughed and calling The Cat from the corner poured a green soup from a thermos into a large bowl. ” Here, little furball,  some hot KKKaaaaryleeetieKaliKookieyum for you and a special piece of smashed up Berlusconi to chew on.”

The cat stalked over with his tail held high, sniffed the soup, walked away, twitched his whiskers, came back, wound around Oggy’s ankles, gave a satisfied feline grin and began to slurp at the soup.

“Where’s that tall gentleman - can’t have you walkin’ round like a skinny streak o’lard, come over here with me.”   Oggy bustled a rather alarmed Henry towards a hamper and, pulling things out at top speed, handed him a bottle of  Aaardmonnikvark Old Bruin. 

"Get some of that inside you, warm the cockles of your heart it will.  Here's a WaterZoo Giraffe Bloodin to nibble on while we wait for Jaymack Kingkiller to do some thinkin'."

Henry smiled to himself, thinking whatever happened he was going to keep in Oggy’s good graces. Wouldn’t even need to steal food for a change.

"Aaah, Justin, glad to feed a lad like you who sticks up for the English language.  Bonny boy, it'd be a pleasure to mentor you in Zummerzet dialect, just practice 'OOOO ARRRR' fer now and you'll can impress Overlord next time he pops by from SupermareOlympus. Still, back to business, made you some Mockingbird, Peach and Pecan pie, with Roswell Waste Salad and Miss Daisy's Special Coke to wash it all down."

Oggy surveyed them all gobbling, nibbling, chomping and munching She heaved a sigh of relief.  Then a voice behind her growled  "So I go hungry, woman?"

"Oh SweetSaintedFannyAdams, Arcane,  don't you ever make me jump like that and don't you ever "WOMAN" me in that tone of voice, do you hear? Have a look in the hampers for now and get that Alter shadow of yours to PM country of origin,  allergies or preferences to me quick smart. I suppose you thought I didn't notice him, slipping around at your shoulder huh?"

Oggy sat down, grabbed a TiddyOggy and a bottle of Glen Fiddich and left them all to decide how to do whatever they were meant to do next. Smug joined her with a pile of chocolate raspberrie muguffffin, his special TurtleshellCupcake and a look of bliss. They smirked and winked at each sitting back to watch the show circus crew.



Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on May 29, 2015, 10:02:55 AM
"The obvious way is up to the top." Spoke Henry with his mouth full of Oggy's delight. "The dragon diamond is most likely there."
Arcane turned to him. "What do you know of the diamond? I've the feeling you're holding back on us."
Henry smiled and whipped up a quick pitiful backstory.
"I come from the small nation Belgarium, where the maidens are sweet and the waffles equal so."
The bard decided this was an opportunity for a song but was hurriedly muffled by the others and Henry continued his elaborate lie.
"Belgarium fears the kingdom of Fantasia and there is one thing that can stop an invasion. The Dragon Diamond."
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Nora on May 29, 2015, 10:49:34 AM
"AAAAAATTCHOOOOOOAAAARK!"

The horrifying noise came from Kassin, who rubbed a bloody nose on his paw-like hands.

"Sorry," said the otherwordly tiger-dragon, "I'm highly allergic to lies."
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on May 29, 2015, 11:00:39 AM
And they were all covered in otherworldly tiger-dragon snot.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on May 29, 2015, 12:00:20 PM
And they were all covered in otherworldly tiger-dragon snot.

And damn, it burned! Oggy of the amazing food [and amazing nonsense writing, seriously, she needs to write a children's book], pulled cooling towelettes from her basket, ripped off the tops of the envelopes and passed the moist, alcohol-laden tissues around.

"Look, everyone," started Black JayMack, "we need to get some matters settled. Then we can look for diamonds and snuff out lies.

"First, I'm passing out your payment for joining our merry band."

Finally, thought Henry and Justin in mental unison - gold.

JayMack reached into the treasure sack and withdrew a wallet. He pulled from it a sheaf of rectangular papers, printed in wild colors with holograms embedded in the ink. He passed a paper to each of his heroes. The papers were marked '50 Guildlings, legal tender in 83.5 planes of existence, can be exchanged for gold pieces at Bank of Realmspace.' They had a picture of very cute goat in the center.

"What is this shite?" grumbled Arcane.

"Oh, this is actually quite good!" enthused Kassin. "This run of Guildlings has been out of print for centuries. I can buy some serious crystal for just one of these. Collectors are mad for them."

"So you're going to give us the gold?" asked Justin, who was now very puzzled.

Kassin thought for a moment about the risk of obligating himself to these mere humans. It was not in his nature to do so. But the goat-run bills! "Yes," he answered with a note of oath-taking. "I will exchange your cash for gold, this I swear."

"Didn't think you needed to go that far," said the Cat around a mouthful of Berlusconi.

"Now, on to the rest," continued JayMack, silently thanking the stars for the odd collecting habits of this strange tiger-dragon alien, if not for its allergies. "A magical object for each of us, retrieved from my evil father's stash. I just hope that this odor of goat I'm getting from the treasure bag was only because of the Guildlings."

Treasure bag, thought Alter. It reminded him of a song, and soon Arcane was singing under his breath:

Quoth she, "What is this so stiff and warm?" —
 down-e-down-e-downy-o
"Tis Ball, my nag, he will do you no harm" —
Lolly-low-lolly-low-lolly-lolly-lolly-low

"But what is this hangs under his chin?" —
down-e-down-e-downy-o
"Tis the bag he puts his provender in." —
Lolly-low-lolly-low-lolly-lolly-lolly-low

Smug toddled over and barfed the remnants of the vengeance ghoul's skull into Arcane's lap.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Nora on May 29, 2015, 12:43:20 PM
"However," Kassin interrupted as he noticed the cat's bum poking out of the treasure bag, "I must call dibs on any crystals present in that bag. I believe we'll find a Coronk cube and a small chip of Incal, and I want both. None of you evolved apes know how to use them and if that cats licks the cube, he's as good as dead, just saying".

The cat back off from the bag and cast a dubious look at his winged trans-dimentional relative.
Justin and Arcane started blabbering at the same time, the first going on about being in this together and team efforts payback and fairness, and the second about cunning devices to abuse everyone and how dragon vomit was worse than tiger-dragon snot.
Henry tried to make them shut up, and Oggy was cradling smug in her arms and sing songing to him.

Jaymack, really, was the cunning one, not losing track of the important stuff.
"How do you know what's in the bag?" He asked.
"Mostly I can smell it," was Kassin's dry answer. "But I can sense crystals. They resonate here, and there," he pointed at some of his ribs and following intricate lines of gold symbols running in the inside of his arms.
"However, besides the fact that I'm the only one able to use a Coronk or an Incal, I'm also able to triple my size and kill most of the ones who'll try to say no. These are very valuable."

Henry frowned at that. "Hey, how much gold are you willing to pay to get your dibs on them?"
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on May 29, 2015, 01:27:09 PM
Laughable humans, thought Kassin. Little did they know that his race could excrete gold. "I will pay double the gold for your goat-issue currency," he pronounced.

The humans looked from one to the other. "That'll work," said JayMack. "The dragon-tiger-alien gets all the crystals in the treasure bag."

Now Kassin would just need to find a large source of lead to ingest.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on May 29, 2015, 03:00:25 PM
Henry secretly slipped one of the strange dangerous gems in his pockets. They looked valuable enough. He grinned.
"Right! We should get going, ladies and gentlemen!" He jumped onto the bottom of the first staircase and led the group up.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on May 29, 2015, 03:07:26 PM
The group watched Henry head up the stairs.

"He does know there are 225 stories to this thing, doesn't he?" asked Arcane. "It's a long climb."

"Well," said JayMack, "Give me a few minutes here to pass around the magic items, explain the quest, and we'll follow after him. Hopefully nothing will eat him in the meantime."
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Nora on May 29, 2015, 03:07:44 PM
But presently a tug stopped him on the fifth step.

"Did you not hear me, or do you still take me for the offspring of a bat and a house cat?" It was Kassin's voice, growling in his ear.
"Ah, yes, what, sorry what?" Henry played it confused. He was good at that.

There was no escaping the long clawed fingers of the monster that had a grasp of him, and soon enough the gem was in Kassin's hands.

For a second there was a flash of purple light, then darkness, before things returned to normal. The gem had disappeared, and Kassin looked... more black. His normal self, but with less white on his hide.
Somehow this made smug laugh. The crystal was nowhere in sight.

"What was that about?" Justin inquired.
"I'm not sure" Arcane answered. "Hey, I sense something very interesting in that bag Arcane, you should insist on those spoils to be spread before you guys start doing anything silly. Like walking. I'll point out the useful one for you." Actually the familiar was getting quite excited.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Rukaio_Alter on May 29, 2015, 04:09:59 PM
"Can I take a look at that thin tube?" Arcane asked, reaching for the object his familiar had pointed out.

"Hmm? Sure."

Jaymack passed over a small, black cylindrical object. It felt light, as if it was hollow. Arcane examined it for a few seconds, before discovering that one of the ends was removable. Inside were three rolled-up scrolls. Arcane drew in a sharp breath. Slowly, he reached out with his sense and touched one. A slight tingle rang along his finger, so subtle that it could've been missed by anyone not searching for it. That confirmed it. These were summoning scrolls. Maybe not for familiars as powerful or versatile as Alter, but useful tools nonetheless.

"I'll take this." He said quickly. A little too quickly.

"What is it?" Justin asked.

"None of your business." Arcane said cheerfully.

"It's fine if you show them." Alter said. "The creator was clever enough to disguise his work. They won't be able to see its true purpose from a look."

Arcane sighed. "Fine, fine."

He picked out one of the scrolls and unraveled it for Justin to see. Unfortunately what Alter did not tell him was what the scroll was disguised as. Apparently the creator of the scrolls was very fond of... risque material. There was a loud hush from the group and many awkward coverings of laps. Oggy placed a hand in front of Smug's eyes.

"Huh." Justin blinked. "No wonder you wanted that."

Jaymack gave an awkward cough. "If that is all you wish, then you are perfectly welcome to the Jaymack family's... private collection."

Arcane's eye was twitching quite furiously at this point. If he wasn't so happy about the prize he had just received, he would be perfectly to choke Alter right about now.

Kassin merely watched the scene with exasperation. "You humans and your <censored>."

"Still I can't help but wonder." Alter said, as a heavily blushing Arcane tucked the scrolls away safely. "The true meaning of those scrolls should be obscured to anyone except summoners. Yet how did Jaymack's father know the scrolls were important enough to hide away in his private treasure stash?"

Little did Alter know that Jaymack's father had absolutely no idea as to the true purpose of the summoning scrolls. He just really liked his porn.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: ultamentkiller on May 29, 2015, 05:54:54 PM
"I think it's time I had a look at that bag. There might be more.. Interesting things in there." After snickering at Arcane and smiling to himself at the annoyance showing on his face, Justin reached and grabbed the bag. "He began muttering to himself as he rifled through the contents. "Weird things... More weird things... More weird... Wait, what is this?" It was a small, silvery object, crafted into a symbol that he had never seen before. Or had he? Something about the object pulled at him. It made him want to disappear into the shadows and wander away. Yes... Maybe just for a bit... Justin stopped himself. No. Something's off about this object. Kassin was regarding him curiously.
"Do you know what that is?" Kassin inquired.
"Not a clue. Do you?"
"Yes." Silence.
"Well..."
Hmm?"
"What is it?" He tried to keep the irritation out of his voice, but some inevitably slipped through.
"Something that you should keep very close. It is not my place to reveal it's nature to you."
"Why not?"
"Because it's different depending on the user. It may do wonderful things to you, or it may bring curses down upon your family. Strange humans. Always accessing powers you shouldn't mess with." Justin stared at the object. So I could die, he thought, or I could become amazing. Interesting. Well, you don't get anywhere without risks. Justin pocketed the object.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on May 29, 2015, 06:09:25 PM
Henry dug through the bag's contents now no one was looking. He wondered why Jaymack's diapers had been a prized possession to the old man. No time, keep looking...ah, what's this?
A shining monocle, wonderful. Something to befit a gentleman. He gave the tiger-dragon a scornful look for stealing that precious gem from him, but this was the next best shiny thing.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on May 29, 2015, 06:12:53 PM
To say that Henry the Jack was pissed at Kassin for nabbing the lovely crystals would be the understatement of the year.  He sort of hung around the edges of the group, but finally he sighed and reached for the treasure bag. Odd-feeling thing, gross-feeling thing, OUCH!, sharp-feeling thing, round-feeling thing.

Oh. A monocle. Next best thing. When he screwed it into his eye, a small brass wire unfolded and reached around to his ear. Far above him now, seeming to come from miles away, Henry heard a carillon playing the national hymn of Belgaria. He turned in a fog to start up the stairs once more. Oddly, the monocle displayed blinking letters which said "This way to the top."

A belfry. A carillon. A wish fulfilled.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on May 30, 2015, 12:37:40 PM
The carillon was still ringing blissfully in Henry when he spotted something else with his monocle. A troupe of neko bar maids were storming right at them, and they seemed vicious. "Everyone get on with it, we're losing time! We have some of the guardians of this place headed right for us. At their current speed, they'll reach us in 2 or 3 posts!"
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: ScarletBea on May 30, 2015, 02:15:36 PM
As the Doc's group prepared for a night of partying with the Nords and the German, Scarlet decided to do a bit more spying.

Aboard the magic carpet that she had used to rescue the drowning Nords, she quickly flew to the lighthouse, where she could see Jaymack's group. Some had gone in and started climbing, but others were assembling outside, still discussing food.
Scarlet still thought about stopping and getting some more of Oggy's chocolate mousse, frack it was good, but she decided on stealth this time.

Turning the carpet to the hidden tower side, she quickly flew to the top and tried peering through the windows.
Strange, despite the balcony surrounding the top floor, and the floor to ceiling windows, she couldn't see anything inside.
And an old canvas bag with a pirate's symbol (skull and bones, of course) was tossed on a corner of the balcony, looking ravaged by the weather.

'Hmmm something is very strange here. Could that belong to the Cap? How did it end up here? What does it contain?
I'd better return quickly and let him know.
I just hope they have managed to contain the frenchie again, those hips give me nausea every time I look at them...'
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Nighteyes on May 30, 2015, 02:20:26 PM
But before Scarlet left, she made sure to leave behind that sinister wicker basket the captain had entrusted her with.  She muttered over it, 'But this was no ordinary chicken. This chicken was evil manifest.'   Then just to make sure they opened it up, she left a sign saying 'Free Cookies' on top of it. No way could they resist that. 
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on May 30, 2015, 03:47:20 PM
"Wait, what? We're outside?" puzzled JayMack. "When did that happen?"

"When you weren't posting," said Oggy. "Haven't you learned anything by now?"

Meanwhile, this was the third post since Henry had called their attention to the mass of Neko bar maids running in their direction, yowling and wielding cat 'o nine tails whips.

"Run!" yelled Henry. His monocle pointed back up the stairs of the tower, with a blinking sign saying "This way" to the Dragon Diamond." The national tune of Belgiar was ringing deafeningly in his ears. He ran back into the tower and  up the winding staircase like a maniac. "It's here!" he sang deliriously.

JayMack began to parcel out the last treasures as they ran. "On for you, Oggy. And one for you Cat. And one for me." Oggy gave him a dirty look, and JayMack passed out the last prize to Smug.

The bar maids, with huge knitting needles stuck through their black up-dos, were screaming "Kawabunga" as they drew closer.

Le Chat unwrapped his treasure and found a small golden statue of a velociraptor.  His attention was drawn to the mudflats, where a Viking Nord ship was wallowing in the shallows.  On the far side, he saw a horde of raptors nearing the ship. And... a T-Rex. He hefted the golden statue. Maybe he could do some good in that thread. He split off from JayMack's group and -

Meanwhile, Kassin looked over at Arcane and Justin. "Dragon Diamond, hmm? It sounds like a crystal. I must have it."

"Sounds like Henry is going to climb those 215 flights of stairs," sniggered Justin.

"Hey dragon-tiger," offered Arcane," think you could just fly us up to the top of the tower?"

"What about JayMack?"

"He's got a pet dragon, doesn't he? Besides, he'll keep the bar maids distracted."

"Well, then," replied the alien," climb aboard. But don't put your feet on my crystal sensing organs."

"Team Omega rides again!" crowed Justin as they rose into the sky toward the tip of the light house/belfry/tower/thingy.

Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on May 30, 2015, 04:00:10 PM
As the others climbed or flew up the tower, black jaymack was glad he was short for once...and so were the girls' skirts. Smug grabbed a delusional Jaymack in his maw and carried his master away from the temptation and closer to their true goal.

Meanwhile Henry dashed up another flight of stairs while singing the hymn of his country, which everyone got wrong, it's Belgarium.
"For king, freedom and right. For king freedom aaaand riiiiigght."
He chanted while defeating a game of wizard's chess, an eldritch abomination and a dwarf in a drinking game for the princess's undies. He reached the top just in time to see the others leave again.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on May 30, 2015, 06:11:08 PM
Team Omega landed on the roof of the tower and saw two objects: a bag of cookies, marked "Eat Me" and a duffle with a skull and cross bones.

"The duffle," said Kassin, "I can smell that crystal from a mile away."

"They use miles where you come from?" asked Justin.

"Of course. We're an advanced alien species." The three flew off the belfry/lighthouse/tower top and headed back to earth where JayMack has huddle behind a rocky outcrop while Oggy was flaying sushi for the bar maids. Somewhere, she'd gotten a hold of some amazingly fresh kraken meat, and everyone was getting quite full.

Henry saw Team Omega leave, but had no idea there had been two packages. He saw the cookies marked "Eat Me". Crickey, how insulting, he thought. But he was so close now to his life's goal. The Dragon Diamond must be in that picnic basket. He opened the basket, and gaped in horror. For what was inside was truly no ordinary chicken.

The chicken was evil manifest.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: ScarletBea on May 30, 2015, 06:22:52 PM
[This isn't just chicken. It's a MasterCap & Scarlet chicken.
Of course, in certain regions they had dropped the full names and just used the first letters
 ;D]
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: ultamentkiller on May 30, 2015, 06:35:53 PM
Just on a side note, I hate when things don't post. Gur.
---- As Team Omega flew on Kassin's back towards Jaymac, Justin heard a terrified scream. Justin chuckled. "I think Henry made it to the top of the tower."
"Think he's screaming from the pain of his feet?" Arcane asked.
"No, probably something to do with those cookies. They might've been off-brand oreos." Justin shuddered. "Should we go back for him?"
"No," Kassin roared. "We have what we wanted."
"Wait," Arcane called out. "There's something up on the tower with him. I'm not sure what it i..." A chicken plummeted past them, making a sound that could only be described as demented clucking. And clinging with all of his strength to the chicken's back...
"That's Henry," Justin called. "Kassin chase him!"
"I am not some alien pet you can just order around," Kassin replied irritably.
"He's not even apart of our team," Arcane muttered under his breath. An idea formed in Justin's head.
"Kassin, he's a thief. He might be able to help you find more crystals in the future if you save him." The dragon tiger thing paused in midflight. Then he plummeted down after the chicken and Henry. Justin looked at the path of the deadly chicken and gawked. "Hurry! He's headed for Jaymac's head! And at the speed he's going... He'll be there in two posts!"
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Lady Ty on May 31, 2015, 06:21:01 AM
Just on a side note, I hate when things don't post. Gur.
Commiserations it's happening to me all the time, started to write it in Word and cut/paste, also post early and add rest by modifying  ;)

Oggy looked up, yelled "Ladies, knitting needles forward". All the Neko girls hissed, twitched whiskers, flexed their claws and thrust the needles high above them , jabbing fiercely at the huge chicken as it fell towards them.

 - SPLATFESTSUPREME

Blood, innards and specially stinky gubbins spread all over the place and left Henry sitting forlornly in the middle covered with feathers.  Team Omega veered wildly out of the way and crashed into part of the cstle ramparts, falling in a tangled heap further away and temporarily stunned.

"Can't have been a genuine M&S chook" said Oggy. "Wouldn't have passed their quality test, smelling like that and now we can't even cook it.  Henry get cleaned up fast  in that stream over there then we all need a little talk with Kingy, before the others get back here."

Henry got a little cleaner and  recovered with a Scroopulicious Waffle. Jaymack was chewing on a Bobcat Jerky sandwich but kept having to spit out the road gravel that seemed to be included. Oggy really didn't understand about grits, he'd have to explain, he decided.

"I'm worried about that Kassin," Oggy confided. "He's a slippery lizard and trying to gain control over all of us. He's sneaking off  in a nefarious subplot with the others in Team Omega, so we better keep an eye on them all. He managed to get hold of all those crystals and we've no idea what he can do with them. Just because he's so big and powerful doesn't mean he's invincible. I noticed when I spilled a little cider near his foot he snarled and grumbled and it smoked for a minute. He was very quiet after, I believe he's vulnerable and allergic to all apple products. I've prepared you some  syringes full of quadruple strength Mendip Scrumpy and aged for two hundred years. Keep these handy in case he attacks you. " 

Jaymack and Henry persuaded the  Neko girls to be the crew's back-up army as long as Oggy kept the food coming. Doc and co could have their calagnome horde but these lasses were pretty smart with needle and nine-tail combat.  Jaymack began to feel more confident as he had worried about not having his own Swordforhire. Now he suddenly had a hundred and fifty warrior maidens ladies on his side, and, wow, what stunning scarlet and gold leather uniforms.

Meanwhile Oggy and Smug returned to the castle kitchen. Oggy put some cheese made from goat’s llama’s milk with a packet of GobHobs and a note that read  'Scarlet Lady,  that manky chicken from your boss wasn't very nice. Maybe we need to talk so next time you drop by enjoy this snack, then try to find us. Smug needs a cuddle, and you and I may be able to strike a deal.'

On the way back to join the crew Oggy whispered to Smug "King Jaymack gave me his old diaper, but nobody else realises it is really a duster to control the weather, especially good for violent eruptions.  That could come in very handy, along with your special gift."   
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on May 31, 2015, 06:30:18 PM
With things bit calmed down, JayMack could take a moment to look at the magic item he'd kept for himself from his father's grab bag. It was a beat up trumpet, with loose keys, a bent bell and green oxidization on the brass. It didn't look like much, but JayMack knew what it was.

The Horn of Attention.

JayMack put it to his lips and blew one long, sour note that reverberate across the entire island. For a bare second, every clamor in voice, growl, hiss and roar for one mile around stopped, and the angel of silence passed overhead. Then it all started up again.

Except for JayMack's crew. Each one, excluding Oggy, had come to stiff attention. Yes, even the alien.

"Now hear this!" cried the little king. "This crew seems to have as many agendas as it has members. But let's pitch in together for just a moment to see what we have. Kassin, what did you retrieve from the belfry?"

The alien took a moment to decide, but then muttered "winter salt melt." "What?" said JayMack, "I'm not sure we all heard you."

"Winter salt melt!" Repeated the tiger-dragon. "Are you happy?"

"You couldn't smell that's what it was, huh?" snarled Henry. The alien looked ready to rip the thief's guts out, but JayMack interrupted.

"Okay, you were all lured to the top by fake crystals masquerading as the Dragon Diamond. Let's get past that. Henry, is the combined Monocle and Hearing Aid of Albatross still telling you to go up the tower to find the diamond?"

"Er, yes. And now I see a little menu item that says 'More', and when I select that with an eye twitch, it says "go to laboratory #2.'"

"Then alright," said the Mack. "That's where we're headed. Is there a map of the tower, showing the laboratory?"

"N-no,"said Henry, lying almost out of habit. "We're just going to have to search the place."
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on May 31, 2015, 06:51:21 PM
Because let's just face it, searching the entire place is way more fun than simply going there and grabbing what you need. Who knows? They might find shinies.

As they went on, it turned out there was more to the belfry than met the eye. It was more a hyperdimensional maze rather than a belfry to tell the truth. It did have carrillons though and that's what was most important.

They entered the tower again. Who knows what they'll find in this interspatial, wibbly wobbly construct? Maybe the famous intellectual heyena? The hyena that would always say hello and excuse himself for laughing.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on June 02, 2015, 12:07:44 PM
Of course, there was a map to the laboratory showing on Henry's monocle. Not like he was going tell any of these twerps, though. That JayMack with his horn. For Pete's sake. (And who was Pete anyway, and what exactly is a sake? Or was that sake? Warmed, wonderful rice wine.). Henry set off up the steps of the tower.

"Um, have we seen this before?" asked Arcane. "You know, Henry starting up the stairs without the rest of us?"

"It's okay," replied Justin from the shadows, "I'm sure he'll be back at some point."

"Kassin," asked JaMack," any chance you can sniff out this Laboratory #2?"

"I am not a tool that you should -"

"Yes,yes,yes" Oggie interrupted. "We know you're a sophisticated alien from another dimension and all that. But I do know how to bake a crystalline sulphur cake." She smiled as the dragon-tiger's mouth opened and saliva dripped from his jaws.

"I'm sure I can try something," said the alien quickly. "Of course, how I'll tell laboratory #2 from #1, I can't say."

Meanwhile, Henry had discovered a door on the second floor that he'd never seen before. He opened it. What should have been a small tower room was actually a long corridor that stretched into the distance and out of sight. "Bigger on the inside!" He said. "I knew it."
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on June 02, 2015, 05:00:37 PM
Henry just wished he had some of Pete's hot sake to drink right now. This place was so bizarre.
He walked on through the corridor, passing door after door after door. Some doors were large, some doors were small, some doors were right, some upside-down. They were all nameplated too. One said Jmack, another ScarletBea, then there was Nora too... who were these people? The owners of the doors? Some kind of demonic overlords that played with them like puppets in a deranged rp story?

Kassin sniffed and snuffled, walked here and there. The others simply followed the tiger-dragon thing, good of faith that the alien creature wouldn't betray them. You know, as is common in these kind of stories.

Henry stopped at a door that simply said "Henry" and opened it, anxious to find what was on the other side. The dragon diamond?
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on June 02, 2015, 05:23:50 PM
There was a strange, accountant-looking man in the room, sitting at a wide wooden table. He looked up and gave Henry the Jack a thin smile.

"Mr. Dale, I presume?" He flipped through a set of files, and slid one out; opened it, and removed a single sheet of paper.

"Er, I suppose," said the Jack.

"Yes, Mr. Dale. Indeed, Mr. Dale. Mr. Dale, I have here a warrant for your arrest and punishment by order of his highest Goatness, Atku. Have you anything to say before sentence is passed?"

Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on June 02, 2015, 05:28:57 PM
Henry the Jack backed away... "No!" he screamed. "You can't catch me yet! My birthday is only in 19 days! Tell that goat to go punish someone else."
The accountant frowned. "In that case, you're too early." He took a little goat doll and made Henry stare at it intently. The eyes lit up.

Henry found himself in a long corridor. How strange...had he been here before?
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on June 02, 2015, 05:46:07 PM
The corridor ended in a cul-de-sac with three doors. On one door, text was scratched into a metal plaque, and read:

     I write this here inscribed in metal so that Atku cannot change what I say here. Do not believe what is written on any door but this one. Enter here.

On another door, there was a similar inscription, but this time in wood. It read:

     I write this here inscribed in wood so that Atku cannot change what I say here. Do not believe what is written on any door but this one. Enter here.

And finally on the third door, there was an inscription in whipped cream that somehow had not melted or dripped but tasted fantastic.

     I write this here inscribed in whipped dessert topping so that any passers by can have a taste. Do not believe what is written on any door but this one. Enter here.

Henry scratched his butt head. This was a puzzler.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Lady Ty on June 03, 2015, 05:23:20 AM
  I write this here inscribed in whipped dessert topping so that any passers by can have a taste. Do not believe what is written on any door but this one. Enter here.

Henry couldn't resist the whipped dessert topping. Guilelessly believing that only good could come from such a delicious challenge and hoping there was an early birthday cake awaiting him, he eagerly bounded through the door..........

.........and found himself in a long room with laden kitchen benches in every direction. Trolls, Elves, Olympians, Mistwraiths, Dragons, and a few Frost Giants, all wearing black aprons, were slaving away over pastry boards, pressure cookers, ovens, mixers and piping bags.  At the front stood three asses wearing long white wigs and scarlet robes. On a table in front of them were place settings for a gourmet degustation. On cushions to one side were three large black caps.

“Welcome to  First Emperor Chef King Initial Nouveau Gastronomie Contest, ”  someone shouted at Henry. He turned to see a tall man with wild black hair staring fixedly into his eyes and gesticulating at him with pointed fingers. "This is the Instant Death Round."

“I am Macho Pierre Blanc and you are contestant three hundred and nine. Take your place at a bench and make yourself the hero of the dish. We wish to see you on a plate. A few tears and a soppy background story will help with the judges.”

A short redfaced orc with a spikey hairdo strode forward and thrust his face close, eyeballing him with evil intent.   Macho Pierre Blanc introduced him to Henry.

"This is your mentor* Gordy Ramsbum from Bistro Hades. You must achieve the fourteen dish menu with Soylent Green and three other ingredients in the next forty minutes. Failure means instant and permanent elimination but success will bring a wonderful reward for you and your friends and make you F.E.C.K.I.N.G Winner-for-LIfe. Go forth young man and do your best to degust!”

Henry rolled up his sleeves in desperation and began to cook. The honour of the crew was at steak, not to mention his life.


 *Please fill in all GR’s mentoring for yourselves, you only need  F’s G’s and ***’s.

Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Doctor_Chill on June 03, 2015, 05:44:40 AM
Unfortunately, Henry knew not how to grill a steak. Things were looking bad for his survival.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Lady Ty on June 03, 2015, 05:55:14 AM
Unfortunately, Henry knew not how to grill a steak. Things were looking bad for his survival.

Knew someone would bite ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on June 03, 2015, 08:12:36 AM
Now we'll leave Henry's ordeal be for a moment and return to the rest of the troupe. After all he's been in the spotlight for quite some time now.
Jaymack and the others had been following Kassin through the maze and happened upon an orchard. The apples on the trees looked delicious. Oggy couldn't wait to turn them into pies, but Justin stopped her. "There's something magical about them. Oggy reached for an apple either way. The sound of didgeridoos stopped them."
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Lady Ty on June 03, 2015, 09:39:17 AM
A mob of giant skippy's, all playing rainbow striped didgeridoos, hopped up to surround the crew. They all wore bus conductor's caps, with green and gold stripes.  Kassin gaped, they were bigger than him and definitely had more powerful tails. Arcane, Justin and Oggy moved promptly behind Jaymack as the leading mobster skippy grinned at them.

"G'day mates, howryagoin'? Those Tassie apples are premium ticketstaride, so grabahan'ful each and climb inta our pouchpockets. The joeys'll make room ferya.  Whered'yawannago?"
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Nora on June 03, 2015, 03:10:45 PM
Kassin snorted. This was it.

He walked away from the roos and the now overly excited group of mercenaries that had come forth to pet the giant animals or eat fruits and chat idly.

Things were off. Too many of them. Ever since the call had rung and he had joined that team of misfits, it seemed like the barrieres between parallel worlds had thinned, disrupting normality and laws of physics and probability.
Could his own inter-world travel had been a cause of problem? Was his participation to the events making a snow ball effect on the future of this world?

Kassin spoke aloud in his tongue, often too high for humans ears to hear, and took notes he dictated to his storage Kark crystal. He needed some insight from his home world but daren't open a portal yet, in case it was what caused such chaos here.
A shadow thickened by his side as he finished the last sentences.

"Yes?"
"Well, what are you doing Kassin?" Justin asked, materialising in his lean human form.
Kassin didn't answer but instead eyed the human thoughtfully.
"Would you be interested in getting some new skills Justin?" the Dracon asked, whipping his forked, harsh tongue out as if to sample the air to taste Justin's feelings. "I could teach you something even more powerful than the single rune you carry carved on you. Something far more dangerous but rewarding."
Kassin grinned, exhibiting his dagger length set of silvery teeth like a death threat and waited for Justin's answer.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: ultamentkiller on June 03, 2015, 08:48:29 PM
"Hell yeah," Justin replied eagerly. "You seem to know a lot of things that I don't. I'm up for whatever. you have in store."
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Nora on June 04, 2015, 02:56:46 AM
The scholar in Kassin came to life with delight. he had no idea if the power tattoos his kind used extensively would work on a human, or affect his health. Or even if the ascendant would work...
The ascendant principle dictated that the tattooer kept a power over the tattooed, preventing the gifted powers to be used against him.
Trained tattooers obviously enjoyed a very large power and superiority in Dracon society. Kassin was just one such tattooer and a very talented one. He had gone so far as to work some of his own technology in the tender flesh of his belly, making him an independent force to be respected.

The shard of Incal crystal he had picked from the bag of goodies was one of the medium type of tattoo stones one used to gift power.
This young man Justin had a remarkable mastership of shadows, for someone who went about with nothing more than a crude blood rune, Kassin didn't doubt that he could push his talent far beyond the current state of things.

The two of them huddled in a corner, whispering to each other out of earshot from the main group.
"I would tattoo you on each of your forearm, on the inside there," Kassin said, running a soft finger along Justin's arms, "it will hurt like hell and bleed a bit. The pain will stay for longer than on a normal tattoo of your world. Power will suffuse your flesh."
Justin perked up at the mention of power. "What would this allow me to do?"
"I would tattoo you for mastery of shadows. If you were what I am, the effect would be that you could completely disappear in dark shade, you could stalk people in their shadows, you could move unnoticed across rooms as long as you have shadows to reach, and you would be able to expand it around of you, creating artificial nights and killing light in poorly lit places. Bend shades and shadows too, to light a path or hide it.. truly it depends on your imagination and your own substantial power."
Justin gaped. It sounded too good to be true. "Any drawbacks?"
"Well, I'm not sure if it'll work just like that, I never tattooed a human. Also you shouldn't be able to dupe me with shadows if I don't wish it, tattooers have that privilege."
"Huh. I guess that's like a pact of non-agression? An association of sorts?"
"I'm more curious than anything else." Kassin answered coolly. "I'm sure we can collaborate anyway, you seem rather sensible and dedicated to whatever your own cause is. As long as it never crosses mine..."

Justin thought the proposition over and finally nodded, holding his front arms forward to Kassin. Who doesn't gamble a bit doesn't get anything exciting... right?
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on June 04, 2015, 04:19:11 AM
"We're searching for Laboratory #2" JayMack told the Aussie renegade conductors. "Can you take us there?"

"Aow, 'n why might tha' be the place for ya, mate?" the lead creature asked. A platypus tried to pop out of the kanga's pouch, but the thing gave it a beer and a pat on the head and it pulled back inside.

"Well, we think that's where we'll find something important. But we have no idea what." Even JayMack thought that sounded lame. But the chorus of skippys just said, "Hop in and hang on tight. Make sure to have your apples out where I can see them"

JayMack, Oggy, Arcane and Smug all jumped in.
Leaving Kassin and Justinchatting in the shadows.
Henry the Jack slaving in the kitchen.
And Raptori Le Chat utterly disappeared from the narrative.

Inside the pouches, they found a rumpus room filled with rubber duckies and cupcakes. Before they could stay "Tolkien" they were being given the green light to disembark. Piling out, they saw a glass door with thin wire mesh between its panes, and labeled "Laboratory #2".

They peered into the room, and saw a small gold ring held in a stasis field, projecting wild lights and energy around the laboratory like someone's lost and demented disco ball.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Lady Ty on June 04, 2015, 04:20:41 AM
Justin writhed, squirmed, flinched, flailed, twitched and trembled on the ground trying to relieve the pain. It was agonising, irritating, crucifying, annoying, bruising, tormenting, excruciating.
It hurt.
Kassin watched impassively.
Finally Justin became calmer and gently cleaned his blood soaked arms with a cool cloth which had appeared conveniently nearby.
" This better be worth it,” he grated out through gritted teeth and looked at his arms.
His eyes widened and his mouth opened in a soundless scream …….
(https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSLGnuo-xAr9DW3zaEsNTg2L92dPIMa_JqNkzVWDpRCjvokvQGaYw)as he stared at his new tattoos…………


Meanwhile Oggy and Smug looked with delight at the stasis field.

"Superpower premium fuel for your flames at last, Smugs, go for it!"

The dragon leapt forward and licked eagerly at the sparkling energy. Suddenly -  ta da - the stasis field collapsed and the gold ring was within reach.

 Smug licked his lips, burped loudly and his scales began to glow with excitement.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Henry Dale on June 04, 2015, 04:14:08 PM
Macho Pierre Blanc tasted Henry's concoction and looked pensive at Gordy Ramsbum, then eyed Henry.
"This is the most tasteless turd I ever ate!" He screamed.
Henry shrank down to the size of a mouse and Gordy stared him down with eyes of hate.
"...This means, we have a winner! Ladies and gentlemen!"
A big boom and confetti all around, Macho Pierre Blanc shook Henry's hand.
"Thank you so much! All that judging and people try to do their best and all I get is good food. But finally, finally I get someone whose cooking is so abominable. Thank god, I needed that, you win."
Henry blinked in disbelief. "What?!"
But he was already pushed ahead to the stage.
"We present you with this wonderful First Emperor Chef King Initial Nouveau Gastronomie Contest knife and a great prize behind these locked doors. A ring of great power."
Henry, still taken aback, took the knife and pocketed it with his other shinies, then he reluctantly opened the double doors and came upon a dragon licking a ball of fire.
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: Lady Ty on June 05, 2015, 11:21:51 AM
Posted before I read Birthday Cycle and The Downfall, but worth a smile

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to Doc or Jaymack, The Great God Atku sent out heralds into all the lands, summoning his mighty warriors...........................

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQev3UoGp2M
Title: Re: RPG 2015: JayMack's Quest for the Dragon Diamond
Post by: JMack on June 06, 2015, 02:17:13 AM
The Ring of the Wilding. A nearly mythical object of random power, great danger and equal opportunity. With the stasis field sucked into Smug's maw, it's magic was freed and the effect was immediate. What had been confused and confusing shook itself like a metal foil in the sun, reflecting reality into strange angles and lights.

Henry was nearly blinded. His fingers missed the ring as it spun in the vacuum of the laboratory.

Jason and Kassin wrapped themselves in the deepest shadow. The ring reached out, touched the shadows, and they opened a whole in space-time. The two heroes were sucked through and disappeared.

Arcane and JayMack caught the spinning ring between them. It would hold still, but bounced between their cupped hands.

And Smug began to grow. Fed by the stasis field energy and touched by the wildness, his stubby wings grew, his back elongated, and the little fire of his belly bloomed into a raging inferno. "Yes!" crowed Oggie. "Yes, little one! Find yourself! Find your wings! Soar!"

The ring of wild spun faster and faster. Closing his eyes against the light, JayMack trapped it and forced it over one finger.

Time stood still.

A portal opened across the room. The Goat God emerged, stuffing his entrails back into his hide, and clearing his throat. "Tyrannosaurus roaring is simply awful for the throat, don't you think?

"Well, heroes. I've been watching you fumble your way along, but you've finally done something worth my while. The Wild Ring. You can try to use its magic yourself, or you can trade it for the Dragon Diamond.  No, no, I don't have the diamond. It's in the keeping of one Doctor Chill. It's his crew you've been seeing out on the boats and in the beach screwing around with raccoons and things. So, your decision. With the dragon diamond, you'll have the power to break the rule of Fantasia. Which suits me just fine.

"So, as a God will do, I wave my hand and make a change."

Time re-started. But they found they were in a completely new thread.