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Re: [May 2017] - Music - Discussion Thread I'm in! I can't say I was enthusiastic about the theme when I first saw it, but I'm pleased with the direction I took with it.

May 31, 2017, 02:36:01 AM
Re: [Apr 2017] - Scavenger Hunt - Voting Thread Congratulations @Nora! I loved your story and it stood out to me by a significant margin. I voted halfway through the month, so at the moment I remember that I had a strong emotional response, but I'm not entirely sure why. Give me a little time and maybe I can get a critique done this weekend.

And...I am responsible for @Jmack's vote. I had a hard time picking a second entry, but I went with yours. To be perfectly honest, I can't think too hard about my votes or I'll never vote, but I liked how it pointed out the ridiculousness of so many of our superstitions and the person's joy at simply being alive. I also liked how you put a positive spin on omens, which is hard to do, given that the word has such a negative connotation.

June 02, 2017, 03:42:33 AM
Re: Scavenger hunt/Omen Critique Thread For @Jmack
Spoiler for Hiden:

Selected Quote:

"Like any day.
Like any other magical day."

The repetition worked really well and I loved how the insertion of the word "magical" brought a general appreciation of life to the poem. We fantasy readers probably use the word "magic" as much as anyone else and it doesn't always convey the sense of wonder that it perhaps should. It did here.

Something Awesome: As I said in the other thread, I thought it was really cool how you used the word omen and didn't necessarily attach a negative feeling to it.
Theme Appropriateness: High.

Conflict and Tension: Looking back at the poem, I think you were able to increase the pace of the poem well by increasing the number of things that happen in each stanza.

Characterization: You conveyed the recklessness of the man well, but I like how he remained nameless.

Something Confusing: I always expect poems to be confusing.  ;)  I guess one thing that I might have thought as I was reading without thinking too hard was that the man considered each of his near misses to be omens as well (which is clearly not what you wrote). Also, when I read about the meteor missing by a mile, at first I thought, "Well, that's pretty far away, which is not as dramatic as his other escapes," and then I thought, "But a comet's pretty big, so in the grand scheme of things, a mile isn't that far." It sort of threw me out of the poem for a moment though.

Hope that's helpful!

June 03, 2017, 01:24:15 AM
Re: [Jun 2017] - Gangsters and Crime Lords - Discussion Thread The worldbuilding on this is getting out of control...how can you have a reasonable criminal operation if you don't know what laws they are breaking and why?

It's been a fantastic exercise for me, though I don't quite have a story yet. I do, however, have a situation I am excited about.

I love how these contests are pushing me out of my comfort zone and providing me with a lot of opportunities to experiment.

June 05, 2017, 02:47:40 AM
Re: Main site article - Wonder Woman review I just have to say that I absolutely loved this movie. There were so many things that I felt never get portrayed in big movies like this. I don't watch a ton of movies, so these things might exist in other movies, but these are some of the things that stood out to me:

  • All of those women fighting on Themyscira. First of all, they were women. Not just one woman among a bunch of men. Multiple women. And they were strong, athletic, powerful. The camera did not objectify them.

    • Powerful, athletic women were raising a young girl. How often do you see that?

    • Even if the film did not really portray life on the island, they did make a nod to the relationships that would have existed through a harrowing scream at the end of the beach fight.

      • Even though Diana was naive when she showed up in England, she was never portrayed as an imbecile. She maintained her dignity in an unfamiliar environment when they could easily have turned it into cheap comedy.

      • The film did a fantastic job making a distinction between the glorified fighting on Themyscira and the front. You don't often see that contrast within the same movie and I think it made some of the horrors of war more emotionally powerful.

        And a couple of smaller things.
        • Diana's running was scrappy. She didn't have to rip off a dress or kick off heels and, she charged like she was going to tackle someone. It wasn't dainty; it was powerful. How often do you see women move like that in film?

        • Diana's most powerful move was in a protective formation. I loved how that symbolism reinforced her character and what she was fighting for.

        Maybe these things exist in a lot of films and I've just missed them, but I was shocked by how many things they did in this film felt like things I had never seen before.

        (Also, I don't really know what's going on with the bullet points, but I'm posting anyway.)

June 23, 2017, 04:25:42 AM