September 21, 2018, 08:53:24 PM

Author Topic: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel  (Read 155638 times)

Offline The Gem Cutter

  • Captain Analogy
  • Writing Group
  • Khaleesi
  • *
  • Posts: 2879
  • Total likes: 2308
  • Gender: Male
  • We've exhausted all possibilities - time to begin.
    • View Profile
    • The Gem Cutter Tales
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2370 on: July 10, 2018, 06:24:31 PM »
I'm feeling kind of bummed out.

My dad and his girlfriend are visiting from Norway for a couple of weeks. They're leaving in two days. He just called and invited me along with them, and his sister, for a sightseeing tour to the east. I estimate it would take at least four hours, and he admitted they might follow their whims further into the country.

I declined. I have also declined every other offer to take a trip with them, though I spend the evenings with them. I feel a bit bad about it, but I always have this aversion to any kind of long trip where I can't decide by myself to head home.

I've come far in this whole autism thing, but it's still denying me a lot of the good things in this world.

There's a chance the trip would have turned out okay, but I feel it's likelier I would have ended it overstimulated and irritated.

What Bea said, basically. So far as I have seen, the source of most real regrets, the kind that nag and tug, is all the things we do NOT do. You seem already being nagged and tugged. So get out there. For some people, like me, my willingness to get outside of my comfort zone has led me to periods of discomfort - but for most people, not getting out of their comfort zone is far more perilous. Your will and spirit are like muscles - if you do not use them (in this case to compel yourself to get out and about and spend time with good people), they atrophy and you become weaker over time.

You are insightful, and that's great, but insight must be fed with sights and conversations and interaction. So get out there.
The Gem Cutter
"Each time, there is the same problem: do I dare? And then if you do dare, the dangers are there, and the help also, and the fulfillment or the fiasco. There's always the possibility of a fiasco. But there's also the possibility of bliss." - Joseph Campbell

Offline ScarletBea

  • Welcome party and bringer of Cake. 2nd-in-Command of the Writing Contest
  • Powers That Be
  • Big Wee Hag
  • *
  • Posts: 9687
  • Total likes: 5711
  • Gender: Female
  • Geeky Reading Introvert
    • View Profile
    • LibraryThing profile
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2371 on: July 16, 2018, 06:35:52 PM »
Argh, I'm just feeling so angry!
I was sleepy the whole afternoon, then while driving home I started getting angry... I got home and sat outside relaxing, doing killer sudoku and then reading a bit, but it hasn't properly gone away...

I don't know what to do :-\
At home in the Fantasy Faction forum!

"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - Douglas Adams

Offline The Gem Cutter

  • Captain Analogy
  • Writing Group
  • Khaleesi
  • *
  • Posts: 2879
  • Total likes: 2308
  • Gender: Male
  • We've exhausted all possibilities - time to begin.
    • View Profile
    • The Gem Cutter Tales
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2372 on: July 16, 2018, 07:10:35 PM »
Unless you've changed your diet (more or less caffeine, etc.) or your routine (too much/too little sleep, etc.) and there's no external thing aggravating you, it sounds hormonal. Anyway, the Buddhist technique of simply identifying that you are angry for no real reason seems the easiest way to mitigate it somewhat. Hope you feel better soon.
The Gem Cutter
"Each time, there is the same problem: do I dare? And then if you do dare, the dangers are there, and the help also, and the fulfillment or the fiasco. There's always the possibility of a fiasco. But there's also the possibility of bliss." - Joseph Campbell

Offline ScarletBea

  • Welcome party and bringer of Cake. 2nd-in-Command of the Writing Contest
  • Powers That Be
  • Big Wee Hag
  • *
  • Posts: 9687
  • Total likes: 5711
  • Gender: Female
  • Geeky Reading Introvert
    • View Profile
    • LibraryThing profile
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2373 on: July 16, 2018, 09:50:18 PM »
Trust someone else to identify the most obvious probable cause - it's not as if I'm doing hormone therapy or anything ::)
Thanks Gem ;D
I do feel a bit better now!
At home in the Fantasy Faction forum!

"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - Douglas Adams

Offline Eli_Freysson

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2374 on: July 16, 2018, 10:33:24 PM »
Glad you're feeling better, Bea.

I've just started an experiment of sorts.

I'm seeking to establish a Facebook group for people in the Akureyri area who are like me: Not well suited to the late-night partying scene, but still desiring to meet new people. I'm hoping to at least manage to arrange a cafe chat meetup once or twice a month. Anything more than that will have to depend on what kind of people, if any, sign up.

I'm not going to hold out any great hope here, but it's well established that I don't try anything at all then nothing will happen. And I guess I would rather try and fail than wish I had tried.
I'll notify your next of kin... that you sucked!

Offline The Gem Cutter

  • Captain Analogy
  • Writing Group
  • Khaleesi
  • *
  • Posts: 2879
  • Total likes: 2308
  • Gender: Male
  • We've exhausted all possibilities - time to begin.
    • View Profile
    • The Gem Cutter Tales
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2375 on: July 16, 2018, 10:39:25 PM »
Sounds great Eli, see my signature :)
The Gem Cutter
"Each time, there is the same problem: do I dare? And then if you do dare, the dangers are there, and the help also, and the fulfillment or the fiasco. There's always the possibility of a fiasco. But there's also the possibility of bliss." - Joseph Campbell

Offline J.R. Darewood

  • aka Duckly Breadgood
  • Writing Group
  • Master Namer
  • ******
  • Posts: 2055
  • Total likes: 1177
  • Gender: Male
  • Zork. And it was all downhill from there.
    • View Profile
    • Nerd Empire
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2376 on: July 17, 2018, 05:11:37 AM »
Argh, I'm just feeling so angry!
I was sleepy the whole afternoon, then while driving home I started getting angry... I got home and sat outside relaxing, doing killer sudoku and then reading a bit, but it hasn't properly gone away...

I don't know what to do :-\

I regularly get moody I just chalk it up to IMS

Offline ScarletBea

  • Welcome party and bringer of Cake. 2nd-in-Command of the Writing Contest
  • Powers That Be
  • Big Wee Hag
  • *
  • Posts: 9687
  • Total likes: 5711
  • Gender: Female
  • Geeky Reading Introvert
    • View Profile
    • LibraryThing profile
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2377 on: July 17, 2018, 09:04:48 AM »
Argh, I'm just feeling so angry!
I was sleepy the whole afternoon, then while driving home I started getting angry... I got home and sat outside relaxing, doing killer sudoku and then reading a bit, but it hasn't properly gone away...

I don't know what to do :-\

I regularly get moody I just chalk it up to IMS
IMS ??? ???
At home in the Fantasy Faction forum!

"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - Douglas Adams

Offline J.R. Darewood

  • aka Duckly Breadgood
  • Writing Group
  • Master Namer
  • ******
  • Posts: 2055
  • Total likes: 1177
  • Gender: Male
  • Zork. And it was all downhill from there.
    • View Profile
    • Nerd Empire
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2378 on: July 17, 2018, 09:49:57 AM »
Irritable Male Syndrome. I get it a lot

Offline ScarletBea

  • Welcome party and bringer of Cake. 2nd-in-Command of the Writing Contest
  • Powers That Be
  • Big Wee Hag
  • *
  • Posts: 9687
  • Total likes: 5711
  • Gender: Female
  • Geeky Reading Introvert
    • View Profile
    • LibraryThing profile
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2379 on: July 17, 2018, 10:30:34 AM »
 ;D ;D
So I can't get that, and you can't get mine, which is due to oestrogen elimination in my body 8)
At home in the Fantasy Faction forum!

"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - Douglas Adams

Offline The Gem Cutter

  • Captain Analogy
  • Writing Group
  • Khaleesi
  • *
  • Posts: 2879
  • Total likes: 2308
  • Gender: Male
  • We've exhausted all possibilities - time to begin.
    • View Profile
    • The Gem Cutter Tales
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2380 on: July 17, 2018, 08:03:08 PM »
Went to the dentist and paid $1555 to get my teeth fixed up. My face is numb, my wallet's $1555 lighter, and my mouth aches. I am in NO mood!
The Gem Cutter
"Each time, there is the same problem: do I dare? And then if you do dare, the dangers are there, and the help also, and the fulfillment or the fiasco. There's always the possibility of a fiasco. But there's also the possibility of bliss." - Joseph Campbell

Offline Rostum

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2381 on: July 18, 2018, 10:53:22 AM »
Broke a tooth with a root canal and crown beyond repair on the 11th. Total cost of having it ground down to remove the sharp edges and extracted after I get back in the country will be £60 that said my mum paid over £800 for a filling this year as she stuck with her dental practice after they went private and her dentist retired. She is entitled to free dental work as she is retired.


Offline ScarletBea

  • Welcome party and bringer of Cake. 2nd-in-Command of the Writing Contest
  • Powers That Be
  • Big Wee Hag
  • *
  • Posts: 9687
  • Total likes: 5711
  • Gender: Female
  • Geeky Reading Introvert
    • View Profile
    • LibraryThing profile
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2382 on: July 18, 2018, 12:11:37 PM »
I also stuck with my dentist in Portugal, who I visit once a year when I go there - luckily I never needed an emergency...
The most I paid was around £800 for an implant.
At home in the Fantasy Faction forum!

"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - Douglas Adams

Offline ScarletBea

  • Welcome party and bringer of Cake. 2nd-in-Command of the Writing Contest
  • Powers That Be
  • Big Wee Hag
  • *
  • Posts: 9687
  • Total likes: 5711
  • Gender: Female
  • Geeky Reading Introvert
    • View Profile
    • LibraryThing profile
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2383 on: July 19, 2018, 05:42:32 PM »
What I did today:
I was filmed talking about my experience for an awareness/fundraising project for Breat Cancer Haven, the charity that supported me during my illness :D
The campaign will come out in October, which is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

It was so much fun ;D
« Last Edit: July 20, 2018, 09:46:59 AM by ScarletBea »
At home in the Fantasy Faction forum!

"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - Douglas Adams

Offline ScarletBea

  • Welcome party and bringer of Cake. 2nd-in-Command of the Writing Contest
  • Powers That Be
  • Big Wee Hag
  • *
  • Posts: 9687
  • Total likes: 5711
  • Gender: Female
  • Geeky Reading Introvert
    • View Profile
    • LibraryThing profile
Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2384 on: July 24, 2018, 10:24:07 AM »
Hmmm seems I'm posting too much here...
But I just wanted to share something.

I'm doing some "design training" today and tomorrow, at work. I feel I've kinda messed up on the warm-up exercise because I was/am too literal, too logical :-\
"Think about how people can enjoy flowers in 2030" - and I did it based on the fact that 2030 is only 12 years from now and it's related to real flowers. Everyone else was fully far-out, doing very SF scenarios and stuff... And I think people turned their noses when I mentioned my logic...
Argh my brain!
At home in the Fantasy Faction forum!

"Let us think the unthinkable, let us do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all" - Douglas Adams