June 01, 2020, 02:46:13 AM

Author Topic: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel  (Read 312415 times)

Offline S. K. Inkslinger

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2970 on: March 02, 2020, 07:04:04 AM »
I keep writing and deleting, writing and deleting...
I try to say what I'm feeling and it all sounds like I'm whining, oozing self-pity.
I guess I'm just trying to reach out.
*hugs to all*
I'm here.
Stupid day.

It's been several days but still, belated hugs, Bea!  :D *offers a million virtual hugs* I hope your day gets better and for all the days after that.

Offline isos81

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2971 on: March 02, 2020, 07:40:13 AM »
I keep writing and deleting, writing and deleting...
I try to say what I'm feeling and it all sounds like I'm whining, oozing self-pity.
I guess I'm just trying to reach out.
*hugs to all*
I'm here.
Stupid day.

You can whine whatever you want, however you want and whenever you want :) Just write and hit Post. We're here for each other.

Belated hugs, too! :)
Kallor shrugged. 'I've walked this land when the T'lan Imass were but children. I've commanded armies a hundred thousand strong. I've spread the fire of my wrath across entire continents, and sat alone upon tall thrones. Do you grasp the meaning of this?'

'Yes' said Caladan Brood. 'You never learn'

Offline Cherie

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2972 on: March 05, 2020, 08:09:23 PM »
I don't quite know how to refer to... *flounders*

Technically still my husband, but we're separated, he's moved out but we're still friends.

Estranged husband? Has an implication of animosity in the word estranged, and we're still friends, so that doesn't work for me.
My ex? Seems to trivialise the 12+ years we were together, and in my head my 'ex' is a previous one I left for various reasons, not the least of which was about £30k of debt.
Soon-to-be-ex-husband? Cumbersome.

Offline Cherie

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2973 on: March 05, 2020, 08:12:27 PM »
Thanks, I was feeling blegh yesterday.
Thinking about it this morning, I realise that not having anyone to chat with at work (whether it's mindless stuff or about the important stuff that's happening) is having an impact, so I need to find someone there (the ones I had have now all left...)
I also realised (or rather, let myself accept) that I don't have to go to new places all the time, as much as I'd like to, and going to nice, familiar, places can be a calm thing to do too.
We're all here for the most intelligent conversation you can ever possibly have.

I know it's not the same as sitting face to face with someone who knows you, and just chewing the fat. It's one thing I'm definitely missing of an evening.

Offline ScarletBea

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Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2974 on: March 06, 2020, 08:40:27 AM »
I don't quite know how to refer to... *flounders*

Technically still my husband, but we're separated, he's moved out but we're still friends.

Estranged husband? Has an implication of animosity in the word estranged, and we're still friends, so that doesn't work for me.
My ex? Seems to trivialise the 12+ years we were together, and in my head my 'ex' is a previous one I left for various reasons, not the least of which was about £30k of debt.
Soon-to-be-ex-husband? Cumbersome.
Maybe you're just too nice, although you do say you're still friends...
The first year or so after my break up I always refered to her as "that stupid woman" or "that lying betrayer", hehehe
Now she's just my ex.

If it's just for yourself, invent a word. If it's for the outside world, I'm sure you'll discover the way that 'sounds' best for you.
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Offline Cherie

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2975 on: March 06, 2020, 01:14:55 PM »
Maybe you're just too nice, although you do say you're still friends...
The first year or so after my break up I always refered to her as "that stupid woman" or "that lying betrayer", hehehe
Now she's just my ex.

If it's just for yourself, invent a word. If it's for the outside world, I'm sure you'll discover the way that 'sounds' best for you.
For me, and for people who know us, he's Darren. That's his name, and that's what I call him.

At the moment it's every other conversation that's getting on my nerves; with estate agents, the bank over the mortgage etc etc... I'm kind of getting fed up explaining everything, and getting the 'oh I'm sorry' in response.

Offline ScarletBea

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Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2976 on: March 21, 2020, 07:41:40 PM »
I so missed this thread... A big thank you to all of you who heard me rambling scared and anxious on the phone group, it helped being able to mention it xx
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Offline Cherie

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2977 on: March 21, 2020, 09:32:40 PM »
Sometimes just talking about it, or being able to talk about something different entirely as a distraction, really helps.

I've been really struggling this afternoon. Since my last post, which must have been just before the forum went offline, we accepted an offer on our house (that was a stressful couple of hours on text and email debating the final amount!) I've viewed houses, made an offer and had it accepted on one. I've got forms to complete and sign for the conveyancing solicitors, and an appointment for my formal application for a mortgage this coming Friday. Normally that would be enough to put me in a tailspin, but with the added stress of the virus... I'm not doing well.

This is the kind of time I would rely on Darren to be there with a hug to pick me up. Instead I've got texts and an empty house.

Plus the directors at work have made the decision that everyone is going to work from home where possible. Easy for everyone who has a company laptop, the rest have either taken their desktop PC home, or are signing into it remotely. Essential phone lines have been diverted to dedicated mobile numbers. All except for the one person who is going to hold the fort, take in the post etc, as their job is reliant on the invoices and paperwork that comes in: me. There will be others in and out of the office, so I won't be completely on my own. In comparison to being home on my own, it's better, as it'll force me to get my sorry arse out of bed, but I'm still not looking forward to it.

Offline Eclipse

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Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2978 on: March 21, 2020, 10:09:44 PM »
Hello @Cherie , would you like to join the WhatsApp group? If the forum goes down again We did look for you I think @Bender sent messages to various  other Cheries
« Last Edit: March 21, 2020, 10:11:26 PM by Eclipse »
According to some,* heroic deaths are admirable things

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Offline Cherie

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2979 on: March 21, 2020, 11:01:01 PM »
I thought I'd killed the forum again, I tried to post and it bugged out on me! I found Bender's message on FB; I hadn't seen it as it doesn't notify you of messages from strangers, it relys on you going into the messenger app.

Offline Eli_Freysson

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2980 on: March 21, 2020, 11:12:28 PM »
; I hadn't seen it as it doesn't notify you of messages from strangers, it relys on you going into the messenger app.

God, yes. I hate that. Messages have missed me by weeks.
I'll notify your next of kin... that you sucked!

Offline Eclipse

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Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2981 on: March 21, 2020, 11:41:56 PM »
; I hadn't seen it as it doesn't notify you of messages from strangers, it relys on you going into the messenger app.

God, yes. I hate that. Messages have missed me by weeks.

How many fb messages did you have from people here 😅
According to some,* heroic deaths are admirable things

* Generally those who don't have to do it.Politicians and writers spring to mind

Jonathan Stroud:Ptolmy's Gate

Offline S. K. Inkslinger

Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2982 on: March 22, 2020, 05:07:59 AM »
; I hadn't seen it as it doesn't notify you of messages from strangers, it relys on you going into the messenger app.

God, yes. I hate that. Messages have missed me by weeks.

How many fb messages did you have from people here 😅

I never checked messages in the facebook messenger app, hahah. The only way people on here did reached me was through my email, which I checked regularly.

Offline ScarletBea

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Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2983 on: March 22, 2020, 10:14:02 AM »
Cherie, those are some serious wins, there! Well done :D

May I suggest that when you're at work alone, you put on some music and do some dancing? ;D It will be a great way to break up the day, and make things funny and different.
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Offline JMack

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Re: Depression, Struggles and Light at the End of Every Tunnel
« Reply #2984 on: March 22, 2020, 10:32:47 AM »
Hi, @Cherie

I’m not sure we’ve met. I’m a very long time denizen, I mean, member, but have been out a lot due to reasons.
I’m glad this thread is one outlet for talking and maybe I let for support.

Speaking of being “out” (we’re not talking closets, people”) and “outlet”, how about this for your not-yet-not-husband”.

My Outs.

“Yes, well, my Outs is being a complete jerk this week, you won’t imagine what he’s done.”

It has the virtue of making sense, but probably the curse of raising curiosity.

Anyway, I’m glad to hear of progress on the house and other things. As for work, what a tough assignment! Hoping the best for it.
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