March 21, 2019, 08:05:01 AM

Author Topic: Favourite black or light humour lines  (Read 1459 times)

Offline Eclipse

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Favourite black or light humour lines
« on: December 18, 2016, 11:26:56 AM »
The first thing he found was a man's boot.When he picked it up,he found that it still held a foot. Dancer's Lament by Ian C. Esslemont

I just read that line recently so it's fresh in my memory and it had me smiling, what's yours?
« Last Edit: June 02, 2018, 06:14:53 PM by Eclipse »
According to some,* heroic deaths are admirable things

* Generally those who don't have to do it.Politicians and writers spring to mind

Jonathan Stroud:Ptolmy's Gate

Offline ultamentkiller

Re: Favourite Black Humour lines
« Reply #1 on: December 18, 2016, 03:05:04 PM »
'Lord Tywin Lannister did not, in the end, shit gold.'

Offline The Gem Cutter

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Re: Favourite Black Humour lines
« Reply #2 on: December 18, 2016, 07:03:30 PM »
Glokta's continual internal monologues in Abercrombie's books referencing "Body found in river. Unrecognizable."
The Gem Cutter
"Each time, there is the same problem: do I dare? And then if you do dare, the dangers are there, and the help also, and the fulfillment or the fiasco. There's always the possibility of a fiasco. But there's also the possibility of bliss." - Joseph Campbell

Offline Rostum

Re: Favourite Black Humour lines
« Reply #3 on: December 18, 2016, 07:38:39 PM »
Quote
The first thing he found was a man's boot.When he picked it up,he found that it still held a foot.

Exactly that persuaded a mate of mine that working for an accident recovery specialist was not for him and he needed to get a proper job. The vehicle was a motorbike (double fatality) and the pillions boot and foot were trapped between the back wheel and swinging arm. Presumably not found when gathering up the rest of her.

I am a fan of 'it was the day my grandmother exploded' Crow Road Ian (not M) Banks but Jorg gets consistently better lines than any other character I have read.

Offline Eclipse

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Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #4 on: June 02, 2018, 06:15:54 PM »
I'm fond of my sig


According to some,* heroic deaths are admirable things

* Generally those who don't have to do it.Politicians and writers spring to mind

Jonathan Stroud:Ptolmy's Gate
According to some,* heroic deaths are admirable things

* Generally those who don't have to do it.Politicians and writers spring to mind

Jonathan Stroud:Ptolmy's Gate

Offline Yora

Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #5 on: June 02, 2018, 06:37:34 PM »
Quote
I sprang off my left foot, caught the roof ledge with my fingers, and pulled myself up. Dabir urged care; I do not think he heard my response, as I was too busy not falling to answer clearly, and my words do not bear repeating.
From The Desert of Souls.

Offline Not Lu

Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #6 on: June 02, 2018, 07:39:11 PM »
Even though I knew she was not a witch, a part of me kept saying that the woman was going to grind me up for stew.

Offline The Gem Cutter

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Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #7 on: June 06, 2018, 07:01:26 PM »
It's not Fantasy, but I love this exchange from the Western 'Unforgiven':

"You just shot an unarmed man!"
"Well, he shoulda armed himself."
The Gem Cutter
"Each time, there is the same problem: do I dare? And then if you do dare, the dangers are there, and the help also, and the fulfillment or the fiasco. There's always the possibility of a fiasco. But there's also the possibility of bliss." - Joseph Campbell

Offline Yora

Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #8 on: June 06, 2018, 07:18:59 PM »
It's not Fantasy, but I love this exchange from the Western 'Unforgiven':

"You just shot an unarmed man!"
"Well, he shoulda armed himself."
"I don't deserve this...To die like this."
"Deserve's got nothing to do with it."

Offline S. K. Inkslinger

Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #9 on: June 07, 2018, 09:57:30 AM »
"Can't get robbed if you have no money.", "Calm your tentacles!" and many other hilarious lines from Lift in Edgedancer.  ;D

Online ScarletBea

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Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #10 on: June 07, 2018, 10:05:29 AM »
I can laugh when I'm reading things, but I never memorise the lines...
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Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #11 on: July 04, 2018, 07:18:40 PM »
“We should forgive our enemies, but not before they are hanged”
Heinrich Heine, 1797-1856

Borrowed by Joe Abercrombie  :)
I write about swords and birds and wizards and stuff.

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Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #12 on: July 04, 2018, 09:45:18 PM »
“We should forgive our enemies, but not before they are hanged”
Heinrich Heine, 1797-1856

Borrowed by Joe Abercrombie  :)
Oh, I love that one too!
It was actually what I asked him to write on my books at a signing session ;D
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Offline J.R. Darewood

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Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #13 on: July 05, 2018, 02:48:12 AM »
I can laugh when I'm reading things, but I never memorise the lines...

Now you have a place to write them down!

Offline S. K. Inkslinger

Re: Favourite black or light humour lines
« Reply #14 on: July 05, 2018, 08:28:45 AM »
Some more moments of Lift from Oathbringer. She was cautioning her friend on trusting Dalinar.  ;D

"Don't trust him he has too nice a butt.....old people should have an old flabby butt, then I'd trust you."

She's also been calling Dalinar as 'tight-butt' eversince.